Forest Lake

Chapter 54

I didn’t want to leave Mason.

But I had to.

With shaky fingers, I reached for the toilet paper. I wiped myself and saw blood.

Great. Just what I needed on top of everything.

More tears fell on my cheeks and another sob escaped me.

I guess that could explain all the crying. I was always very emotional when I was on my period.

But this wasn’t about my period. This was about Mason and leaving him. It would kill me, but I needed to do it.

I stepped into the shower and let the warm water wash away my tears.

I tried to imagine my life without him in it and it hurt like hell. I felt like I was being stabbed in my chest. I wanted to scream and jump into his arms and never let go. I wouldn’t even care what other people would think. I just wanted to hold on to him forever.

But I couldn’t. That would hurt him.

I needed to think about him, not myself.

I got lost in my thoughts, and I didn’t even know how long I’d been standing in the shower. I turned the water off, grabbed a towel and stepped out of the shower.

I dried myself and put on underwear, a pad, and my pajamas. I wrapped my wet hair into a dry towel and looked at myself in the mirror.

I looked sad, but you couldn’t tell I was crying. At least, I hoped so.

I took a deep breath and unlocked the door.

I stepped back into the room and saw Mason laying on the bed, scrolling through his phone.

“The guys are getting something to eat.” Mason said, not looking up at me. “They will bring us something here. What do you want?”

I was feeling a little bit sick, and I wasn’t hungry.

“Nothing.” I said quietly, walking toward the desk. “Thank you.”

“Are you sure?” Mason asked as he looked up at me. “You should…”

His eyes widened, and he threw his phone on the bed.

I furrowed my eyebrows. What happened?

He jumped up and ran toward me.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, grabbing my face and eyeing me up and down. “Why are you crying?”

I was crying? I was pretty sure that I stopped.

“Are you hurt?” Mason asked, panicked. “Is it your heart? Should I call the ambulance?”

“I am fine.” I mumbled quietly.

“Why are you crying then?” Mason asked, furrowing his eyebrows. “Are you scared? I won’t let anyone hurt you, Emmy.”

“I am not crying.” I said, shaking my head.

“But you were.” Mason said, letting go of my face and taking my hand in his.

He pulled me up and walked me to the bed. He sat down and looked up at me.

“You are going to tell me what’s going on.” Mason said as he pulled me down to sit next to him.

What could I tell him? I needed to talk to him about leaving, but I wasn’t ready for that. I needed to calm down and get some sleep before I did that.

I could tell him that I got my period. I was a little embarrassed, though. But it was normal. He wouldn’t care about that.

It was the easiest thing to do right now. I didn’t want to talk about leaving, and I knew he wouldn’t let this go.

“I got my period.” I mumbled quietly and looked down at my hands.

“What?” Mason asked. “Speak up. I can’t hear you.”

“I got my period.” I repeated a little louder.

“Oh, Emmy.” Mason said, placing his arm around my shoulders. “Why didn’t you tell me? Are you in pain? I can get you a pill or something else. I heard that the heat helps. Maybe a hot water bottle would help?”

I looked up at him and smiled. I felt more tears fall on my cheeks.

I will miss him so much when I leave.

He wiped my tears away with his thumb.

“I am okay.” I said quietly. “I’m not in pain right now.”

“Okay.” Mason mumbled and furrowed his eyebrows. “Why are you crying then?”

I couldn’t hold on anymore. I wrapped my arms around his neck and sobbed.

“I will miss you.” I said, leaning my head on his shoulder.

“What?” Mason asked, pulling me closer to him. “Why would you miss me? I am not going anywhere, Emmy.”

No.

But I am.