Time Stellar | Sirius Black

132: What ifs

James stared, stared and stared at the babe in her hand until finally, his knees gave away. Sirius was quick to catch him. 

"I have a son." He said, once. Twice. Thrice. "I have a son. I am a father." He repeated. 

He walked on trembling knees, kissed the baby on the forehead and then, surprising Alasia, went to Lily first. 

"Hey, love. Are you alright?"

Lily opened a tired eye and nodded. "Is he okay?"

"He's beautiful. Hasn't opened his eyes yet, you want to hold him first?"

"I'm exhausted." She mumbled, smiling as he kissed her cheek. "You hold him first."

James nodded, coming back to Alasia as he hesitated. She smiled softly. "You will be an amazing father, James." He looked up, and she knew she was right in assuming what was going through his mind. "The best one."

He dipped his chin in gratitude and finally held out his arms for the boy as Alasia gently tucked him in. Sirius came to stand by her and she leaned back in him, mentally overwhelmed. 

"It's a human baby." He muttered. 

The three people there, along with the nurses stopped to look at him. Even Lily choked out a laugh. "What did you expect?"

"I - I don't know, I've never seen a baby!"

"Not even Regulas?" Alasia asked. 

"I was too young to remember." He shrugged.

"I have a boy." James was still muttering in utter disbelief. "I'm married and have a son! Oh, I wish mum and dad were here to see."

Sirius stiffened behind Alasia and she caressed his cheek and softly whispered i love you. He nodded and whispered it back. 

"Stop crying, you all are not the ones who pushed a baby out of your vaginas." Lily huffed. 

Alasia laughed when Sirius and James looked away with red cheeks. "Don't act like fourteen year old boys who've never seen a girl naked."

"Don't talk about this in front of my son." James chided playfully and Alasia shook her head with mirth.

"Have you decided on a name yet?"

"Yes." Lily smiled, outstretched hands for the babe as James placed him in her arms. Kissing both their foreheads. "It's Harry. Harry James Potter."

James looked at her suddenly as though they hadn't discussed the middle or the last name but then smiled widely and repeated it, as though not sure it was all real. "Harry James Potter...."

She nodded and grinned. "There is also something else."

Alasia smirked. "I can guess."

James laughed. "Of course, you can. You know everything."

"I'm feeling left out guys." Sirius frowned, click of the door echoing as the nurses left for the day.

James inhaled deeply. "Lily and I...want you and Lay to be godparents to Harry."

Alasia let out a joyous sound but Sirius was frozen in spot. "You trust me to be his godfather?"

"No one else, Padfoot." James sadly frowned. "No one other than you."

He wiped at a tear that had escaped and rushed to hug James so tight, they both nearly toppled down. 

"JAMES!" Lily gasped then. "He's - he's got...he's got my eyes."

James looked up from the floor, just as Alasia and Sirius crowded Lily. Sure enough, the baby had the most beautiful big eyes ever. The same shade of green as Lily's.

"He's going to be so loved." Remus said from the doorway, Marlene, Dorcas and an entire line behind him. 

Sirius grinned at his brothers and ushered them inside, no one wasting a moment as they all nearly ran over each other, cooing and asking to hold the beautiful boy. Harry Potter. The boy who was loved. 

                                          ‧͙⁺˚*･༓☾　☽༓･*˚⁺‧͙

Alasia and Sirius had crashed on the couch of James' house even though the spare room was readily available. 

"I love him already." Alasia chuckled softly. "To think Lily and I didn't get along during Hogwarts."

Sirius smiled from where his chin was resting on her head, her back on top of his chest. "I always knew you'd be besties."

"Besties." Alasia laughed. "How much time have you been spending in muggle cafes?"

"Loads." Sirius sighed dramatically. "Wasn't like I had anything to do while you were out."

A dull ache formed in Alasia's chest. "You know - "

"I do." Sirius kissed her head. "Don't explain anything to me again. I trust you, Allie."

It hurt so much that she had to leave him in two weeks. Hurt so much because if it went wrong  - no, she would not let that possibility grow a seed in her mind. 

"I don't think I hate babies anymore."

Sirius laughed, the sound husky and sensual. "I want one too after holding Harry."

Alasia stiffened. "You want one?"

Sirius sighed. "Someday. I want a baby, with you. I want a lifetime with you, more."

"You want a baby with me?"

"Of course. Everything I am, everything I want...you are tethered to it, Allie."

Alasia leaned into him more, kissing his cheek. "If I come back - "

"You mean when you come back." Sirius narrowed his stare.

Alasia frowned but nodded. "When I come back, let's talk about this lifetime again?"

"I wish we were born in the same time. I wish too much these days. I wish you didn't have to leave, I wish I'd never wasted so much time hating you. I wish...Allie, we had more time."

"So do I." She whispered. "We'll make more of it, Sirius, I promise. I'll make it count."

"Can't I come with you? If it might be the last time - "

"It won't be." She said firmly. "And you can't. You're needed here, and I'm not sure if Nicolas would truly appreciate it. If he appreciates mine that is. But I'll take care of it. James and Lily need you. And Remus. Now more than ever."

That was the last they talked of it.   But even though Alasia was quick to fall asleep in his embrace, Sirius stayed awake.