Decade | | Azriel

20

Rhys offered to stay for a while when he took Kyla back to her apartment, but she assured him she would be perfectly fine on her own. And she did feel fine. Better than she had in a while.

She washed away Hal's blood and she burned the dress and she felt calm. There was still anger, so much anger, but she was calm. At least for a little while. The calm vanished at the sight of a shadow in her apartment. It thrived despite how light she kept the place, and she knew this shadow was not natural.

"He sent you," she murmured, hating the fear she once again felt. "He—"

"My King did not sent me," the shadows voice was almost musical, "no spying on the Queen, he says, even if he won't call you Queen."

"Leave," she demanded, her voice shaking, "I am not your Queen. Get out. Don't you dare come back."

"I know what you did," the shadow hummed, "it was beautiful."

And then the shadow vanished.

A choked up sob escaped her as soon as she was alone, all that fear that she thought she had beaten down rising back up. That thing got in so easily. She knew it could get in at any time it wanted, that Azriel could too. She didn't know what she would do if he showed up, if he tried to take her. She doubted Rhys would be as approving of her killing Azriel as he was of her killing Hal. Even if Azriel tried to take her away and force her to accept being his mate, he was still family to Rhys. He would choose his brother's life over hers, wouldn't he? Besides, she didn't even know if she could kill Azriel. He was stronger than Hal, more powerful and less easy to fool. Hal's downfall was in underestimating her fury. Azriel wouldn't be that stupid.

Moreover, she didn't know if the bond was to blame or if it was the feelings she had begun to have before the bond ruined it all, but she didn't know if she could bring herself to kill Azriel. Even if it came down to his life or hers, she didn't know if she could bare to end him.

Rhys said it hadn't been Azriel who hurt her, and after today she knew her reasons to doubt him were minimal. He had taken her clear across Prythian to destroy a mantle who had hurt her. Would he have really covered for Azriel if it had been him? She wanted to believe the answer was no. Trust was not that simple though.

She let out a shaking breath and tried to calm herself. The shadow claimed Azriel hadn't sent it. That was hard to believe. Why else would it have shown up? Had Azriel been using shadows to spy on her this whole time? The idea made her feel sick. She had had much light as she could in the apartment, but that couldn't keep out his shadows. Those things weren't natural.

She rubbed her wrist, trying to rid herself of the reminder of the icy burn the shadows had singed into her wrists and ankles that day. Azriel had used shadows on her before, but they never hurt like that. They had been pleasant those few times he brought them out to play. But that day...she didn't know cold could burn so badly.

She swallowed back the fear and disgust rising in her. She didn't want to break again. What would she have to put herself together with this time? She killed Hal. According to Rhys, Azriel had killed the other male who had hurt her. She still didn't fully believe it wasn't Azriel himself who harmed her. Maybe it had been him and he covered it up so Rhys wouldn't know.

She knew he had more power now. She had felt it so briefly before their connection dulled from distance between them. Something had changed. He had some new level of power she dreaded even thinking about. He was powerful enough as he was, but this was new and otherworldly and she had no doubt that he could tear right through Rhys. Maybe even all of Prythian if he wanted to.

Taking in a deep, shaking breath, she rid her mind of thoughts of Azriel as best as he could. It was hard to actually accomplish that when she walked into her bedroom to find an obsidian crown that seemed to eat up light resting on her bed. And there was that pesky shadow she thought she had successfully gotten rid of.

"A gift," the shadow hummed, "an offering."

"I have no interest," she snapped, trying to sound braver than she felt at the moment, "take that thing with you and get out of here. You are not welcome in my home."

"Cruel Queen," the shadow purred affectionately, "you and my King both such lovely cruel creatures. Perfect match."

"I am not your Queen," she hissed, eyes narrowed, "I am nothing to you."

"Our King grieves," the shadow murmured, sadness in that otherworldly voice, "he grieves the loss of your love. He sits so lonely on his throne."

"He shouldn't have attacked me if he wanted me to love him," she shot back, watching the shadow go completely still before it seemed to lose that tension.

"My King did not attack you. It is forbidden in the Shadow Realm for a King to harm his Queen," the shadow spoke as if it thought she should know this, "he may harm anyone except his Queen. His rule would be rejected if he lay an ill-intentioned hand on you. Our realm is a chaotic place, but we have laws more ancient than the existence of your realm. Our gods would strike him down."

Kyla opened her mouth and then closed it again, tilting her head slightly as she observed the shadow.

"You're lying," she accuses, "for him. You're lying for Azriel."

"It is forbidden to lie to the Queen," the shadow responded, once again sounding like it believed this to be common knowledge, "forbidden by our most sacred laws. Queen is always above King. You outrank Azriel."

"I what?" she asked, eyebrows furrowed.

"Queens are preferred in the Shadow Realm, we are just so rarely graced with one. Females tend to reject the Crown," it explained, almost seeming a mused now. "Our God of Creation is a female. She was created to be the wife of another creation god. She was resentful of the role she had been resigned to when she knew she was more powerful than her husband. She created our realm in an act of defiance, and we have outlived the realm created by the husband she left behind."

"What happened to the other realm?" Kyla inquired, cursing herself for her own curiosity.

"Our God's husband may have created it, but he did not have the power to sustain it. It thrived on her energy, not his. When she abandoned his realm to build her own, his began to wither and die. He tried to force her to leave us and go back to his realm. She offered him a place in her realm, a seat at her side as her equal, as King, but he refused. It was an insult to him. He did not view her as an equal, he never did. He would not allow her freedom. He attempted to drag her back to his realm and she reminded him who out if the two of them was more powerful. Without her there, his realm died."

"Is she still there?" she questioned, unsure of why she was even believing any of this.

"She rests now. She ruled the realm as Queen for as long as she pleased, and then she went to sleep," the shadow explained, "she woke once. The last time we had a Queen. Her King tried to steal power, to disturb the balance. Our God woke to remedy that wrong."

"Your God let a shadow attack me," she pointed out quietly.

"She cannot encroach on this realm. She has no knowledge of what was done to you in the former King's name. I often feared she would wake during the rule of the last three Kings and see the horror her creation had become. She would not approve of what we were under their rule. She would be far happier with the vision Azriel is trying to achieve, with what you could achieve at his side."

"Is he okay?" she asked hesitantly. "Azriel, I mean. Is he okay?"

"He is in pain," the shadow answered sadly, "and he is lonely. He feels guilt for how you were hurt. It was done to get to him. He feels guilty. The realm is in tune with the state of the ruling monarch. We can sense his emotions. He suffers."

Kyla was quiet for a few moments, lips set into a frown.

"Can I visit him?" she requested, hating herself for the fear she felt. If everything this shadow said was true, it wasn't Azriel who hurt her. She wanted to believe that.

"You can visit the Shadow Realm whenever you please," the shadow said eagerly, "it is yours."

"It's...I'm not agreeing to be Queen," she stammered nervously, "I just want to see him."