In misery L.H

Part 8:avoidance

"Love please" he croaked his voice raspy and overstrained,Like someone decided to slide sandpaper down his throat and give him gravel to drink. There wasn't an answer and he looked over at me with a little bit of rage and said "so you decided to fucking use her?" And I had to resist the urge to run away from the livid college student "no actually ashton came and got me from school to talk to her " he backed down a bit and stood up and tapped the door a bit before saying "blondies here love I'll be going I love you okay" and you could almost hear a faint 'I love you' back he gave a small smile before looking at me and nodding and left down the hall I stood in front of the dark oak wood ."Cat let me in" and the door didn't budge so I pushed it open and there in the middle of her pitch black room was an outline of a small thinner than before Catarina.I walk towards the figure after shutting the door and set the two milkshakes down on the night stand and crawled Into the bed and under the cover and kicked me shoes off and my jacket.She didn't move and honestly probably didn't have the strength to.She was shiver it the bed and I don't think it was quite cold enough for that but lack of food can do that I'm just very concerned about her lack of food intake I don't want her to end up like me.I coughed a bit the recent amount of cigarettes starting to upset my lungs I wrapped my arms around her and piled her close her back touching my chest she turned around very very slowly until her head was under my chin and her forehead rested against my chest "why?" She asked quietly the simple sound of her voice saddened me. Ashton wanted me to stay away.He said it would be better for you to recover if I wasn't here he blamed me for you disappearing that day.I didn't want to but he knew what you needed better than I could and Cat I'm a walking disaster and then I was alone an-" she cut me off whispering "I've always been alone" and that broke my heart even more than I thought it would and hell I just don't know much of anything anymore "I know kitten I know but I liked the attention Tiffany gave me but you know she ended up fucking jack,That's the second girl to do that and I guess they where dating to I don't know I've been avoiding it." She sat up and reach towards the milkshake and grabbed the pink one and took a sip and I rand my hand up and down her spine my hand slipping under the dark purple sweater "I hate myself" she said with an empty laugh and there she was,The girl I met on the bridge at 2:13 am ."

"Say it ,
you should say it,
Cause id say I was wrong just to make it
Fill all the spaces"

"Cat I don't hate you and I know that probably doesn't matter to you but just know I don't hate you" I said she nodded and I saw the disgusting Orange of a pill bottle.

"What are those" I asked pointing to them,she looked to where I was pointing stiffened up a bit and said "latuda" like I should know what that is
"What the hell is that"I asked laughing a bit."Its for bipolar depression nimrod" she said laughing drinking more of her drink. She sat up and walked towards the ensuite bathroom bathroom "what are you doing?" I asked "I haven't showered in 4 days straight,could you make me something to eat please?and maybe lay out an outfit." And with that the door closed and the and some 80s punk rock music started playing and the shower started going and I took this as my time to do what she asked

I walked into her large closet and grabbed a dark Marion skirt to go with the fall season I don't know.I also grabbed a black button and I threw that onto the bed and look for black knee socks I found them and grabbed a pair of maroon doc martens and I personally though it looked decent together I also grabbed a bra thing and whatever else I could find that a girl would wear and I knew I was blushing furiously.I told her I was going to make the food.I walked into the kitchen and saw Calum and ashton sitting at he table eating sandwiches "I got her she's taking a shower and she took her pill to" I said and Calum dropped his sandwich and ashton just turned around and stared at me saying "you're bullshiting me" and I shook my head no and grabbed a random box of organic macaroni and stared searching for a pot to boil water "no she's taking a shower as we speak and she asked me to make her food "thank god I thought I would have to force her to eat" Calum said taking a bite of his food."I called a doctor but if she's doing okay right now we'll talk about the possibility of not going later." He said and I genuinely wanted to know what her whole problem was. It decided not to push it today an I put the pot in the gas stove and lit it up and watched blue flames dance of the bottom of the pan "well luke obviously you are aloud to do whatever with her just keep her happy and safe okay?" Ashton asked standing up leaving his plate on the table "I'm going to take a shower and fucking shave" he said walking around the table and left the room Calum sat there staring at the plate with evident disgust on his face "I hate him sometimes I really do,He tries hard and I thank him for that but he doesn't always know best for her and he was raised in such a privileged house hold that's he constantly does shit like leave his plates but don't get me wrong we are friends" and with that he stood up and grabbed his plate putting it in the sink next to me "yeah I could tell all of that" I said chuckling a bit he stood next to me and said "give me a bro hug" opening his arms wide "why?" I asked not accepting it yet "because you made her happy so know I'm happy just accept it no hemmo" he said laughing"I'm just kidding I'm half gay its okay" and I just gave him an awkward hug and he left I finished the food put it in two bowls and went to Cats bedroom to find her dressed and braiding her hair I set it down and she thanked me and starting eating a little later she went to the doctor with ashton and I went home