Let's go Home

"Let's go home." Pat said, tears sliding down from his cheeks.

Pran had looked at him lovingly, all his sadness showing through his eyes but he had still managed to produce a little smile.

"Good Luck buddy." Was his whispered reply.

Then, with dread they each entered their homes. Ready to face their parents and a life without each other. Pat was sure Pran would be ok, he had to be. His mother was going to welcome him with the warmest hug and she was going to apologize for that slap. Pran was going to hug his parents like never before and everything would be ok. That was all Pat wished for... for Pran to be ok and if possible happy. Because he knew he was not going to be. Pat knew for a fact he was not going to be ok without Pran in his life. He was never ok without him, his 19 years of life and all the things they went through together was enough proof of that. And he was never going to forgive his dad for that, hell... he did not know if he could even look at him right now.

When he entered their home his parents and his sister Pa were seated on the sofa while discussing worry on their faces.

"Ma, Pa ..." He said softly.

The moment she saw him his sister ran over to hug him tightly, he could not see her face but he was sure she was crying. He took in her reassuring smell and closed his eyes, it calmed him a bit and gave him a little strength for what was to follow. He let go of her and tried to give her a weak smile. Somehow Pa looked even more worried.

"I was so worried for you two... are you ok? Is P'Pran ok?" She had whispered that last part.

He couldn't hold her gaze, he took a deep breath. Here goes nothing he said inside his head.

"He went home... we... We decided to break-up."

He looked at his mom but could not support her worried gaze. He didn't know what she was thinking exactly but she always tried to please all of them never really taking sides which Pat never wanted anyways but made it hard to truly connect with her. Finally he turned to look at his father who looked at him expressionless. And with all his pain, lost hopes and dreams... With all his deception and anger he locked eyes with his dad. Something flickered in those deep blacks of his dad's but he didn't want to delve into it right now. He didn't want to try to find excuses for his father... not now, maybe never even.

"You got what you wanted... you can go back to your selfish hatred now."

He didn't wait for his dad's reply and rushed into his room checking that his windows were closed and the curtains fully drawn. He did not want Pran to hear and worry about him... Pran should not have to worry about anything other than himself. He sat on his bed and finally let out all his pain, having a hard time breathing. He cried for hours then fell asleep out of fatigue.

Pat woke up in the middle of the night, gaping, he lit up his small bedside lamp and looked around as everything slowly came back, then his eyes went towards Pran's room. His heart clenched and he took a deep breath to calm himself. He did not want to cry again. But staying here was so hard, being this close and yet unable to close the distance, he felt like the walls of his childhood room were closing in on him. All his heart and body wanted right now was to jump into Pran's room and hug him to oblivion. In a fury Pat stood up, he had to leave; he could not stand being here, so close to everything, so close to his dad and to Pran. He took his essentials inside his backpack. He did not want to see his father's face for now so he would not come back here for a while. His eyes catched on the tin-can phones they made with Pran, he stopped in his tracks looking at it, they would never use those to talk to each other again. With an impulse he put them in his bag too. Then he silently left his parents house. The night's fresh air caressed his face and he took a deep breath, he glanced towards Pran's house secretly hoping for Pran to come out, Pat let out a sigh and finally proceeded to leave. He made a quick stop by his dorm room to pick some other stuff and Pran's t-shirt. He had left Nong'Nao in Pran's room. He looked at the time on his phone, it was past four in the morning, he sighed, feeling sorry for his friend, as he was about to wake him up. He knocked on the door. Naturally nobody answered at first, so he knocked again. It took five minutes for the still sleepy looking Korn to open the door.