Faraway from the Deep Sea

Unclear Ego

A glimpse of an unknown future.....

There she stands in front of me. Ash bears the same expression as the others but there's an awful sensation from the lack of humanity. It sends a cold trickle on my skin and a chill down my spine. In that world where the sky is entirely painted in black and the surface water beneath my feet only creates ripples with each movement I make. That Ash blankly stares at me, but I know for certain this isn't the alternate version of Enterprise.

"Who are you?" I find the courage to speak
"So this must be nostalgia....." Ash simply sighs
"Huh?"
"Sorry. I was just talking to myself"

The appearance and voice are exactly the same as Ash, but I'm still certain this isn't the same one. Ash's gaze lacks any hope or any kind of emotion. This one only possesses boredom.

"Ars Goetia is what they call it. That man's project.....doomed for destruction" Ash....smiles at me?
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You're a system - a tool. Once you fulfill your purpose, you would cease to function"
"That much is obvious....." I sigh in dismay

I can't deny once I fulfilled my role, there's nothing else left for me in this role. What is that role exactly? All I know is I keep the cycle as it should be. Those who stray off the norm should be eliminated. Although I begin to rethink that purpose ever since being involved with Azur Lane. I'm an intricate system masked as a "mythical demon encyclopedia" in the eyes of humans.

"Have you ever thought of giving up your ego?" Ash asks me something odd
"What?"
"You established one of your own, but have you ever thought of starting all over again? No Solomon, just a blank canvas waiting to be painted by each moment you spend"

Ash stretches out her hand, her voice expressing sweet curiosity. In fact, her usual hopeless gaze and blank lips now fondly gaze and warmly smile at me. This contradicting behavior does unsettle me that I take a step back and swallow my breath. Yes....without a doubt.....this person isn't Ash at all.

"There's something you wanted all this time. An answer" Ash waves her hand
"What answer?"
"It's why you even went as far as becoming a kansen. Even someone so inhuman possessed a desire. All you want is to fulfill it. Just that one desire alone...."
"......."
"Heh. To think you just wanted....."

This Ash lookalike shakes her head while I remain confused. Who is she behind in that disguise? Ash would never speak that way or even appear in my dreams.....unless I'm viewing a possible future again.

"Hmm?"

When I open my eyes a bit, the passing cold breeze makes me shit them for a second. It turns out, it's indeed chilly on the rooftop. I'm used to my human size already, but I miss the moments when my enormous size looks down on the size difference between humans and I.

"Hmm....."

I lazily turn my head left and right when I realized I'm actually sitting with my legs crossed and my hands on both knees. Somehow I'm in a meditating position.....while on a rooftop.

"Humans are both good and evil, kind and selfish, loving and hateful, so forth....."

Now I find myself thinking about the contradicting nature of humanity while I sigh. When I think about it, I'm not too different to a degree. I have my own contradicting nature. My nature is to correct and eliminate, but I also preserve. How can I preserve anything if everyone has to die in the process?

[Welt, how long are you going to brood there?!]

Gangut yelling in my consciousness echoes so irritatingly that I feel like she's screaming right beside me. She's rather excited and impatient for someone about to be an accomplice to causing a commotion to her own nation.