It was already the afternoon, Ava was playing in the living room with Jayden, Luke was out with his friends. I was working on dinner and couldn't stop taking pictures of my babies.
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Ava and Jayden made me feel so lucky, I couldn't believe that they were mine, I had just put the Mac and cheese in the oven when I got a text from Luke, it was an unusual text so I knew something was up. Then my phone started ringing, it was Luke so I immediately picked it up. Cassie "hey babe", Luke "hey", Cassie "what was with that weird text you sent me", Luke "I'm leaving at the end of this month for deployment", Cassie "that's this week, for how long", Luke "from what we know a few months, we weren't told anything specific yet", Cassie "how are we supposed to tell Ava this, and what if your not back before her birthday", Luke "listen I make it my business to be back before her birthday, I'm not gonna miss it and I'm not gonna miss Christmas", Cassie "okay", my voice started to get raspy before I broke down in tears, Luke "baby please don't cry", Cassie "how else am I supposed to feel", Luke "I'm coming home right now", before I knew it Luke was back home and had his arms wrapped around me, it was pretty chill until Ava came out and saw me crying. Ava "daddy why is mommy crying", Luke "daddy has to go away for a few months", Ava didn't quite understand what was going on, she broke down in tears, Cassie "you won't even be here for my release party", Luke "I know babe. I'm sorry I can't change the months, it's doesn't work like that you know that", Cassie "how am I supposed to be happy about this album if I'm focused on you leaving and not being here", Luke "we will FaceTime and call each other whenever we can", Cassie "that's not the same", Luke "I know it's not the same, I'm gonna go pack", I put Ava and Jayden down for a nap, I couldn't think straight so I went into my recording studio and started playing my piano while singing. I hate the way you say my name I hate your picture-perfect lips on mine If I could, I'd cut the brakes I hate that I can't help but stay, oh my [Pre-Chorus] When you look at me, I have to turn my face If I look too long, I'll never look away Babe, I wasn't praying for a saving grace Unfold your fingers, let's go back to nothing". I thought I was alone until I turned around and Ava was standing right there, Cassie "what's wrong baby", Ava "not tired", Cassie "wanna come sing with mommy", Ava "yeah", I picked Ava up and sat her next to me. She already knew part of coming home, so I started singing and she sang along with me. Not too long after we started singing, Luke was standing in the doorway. Cassie "Ava go to your room for a second baby", Luke "are you mad at me", Cassie "no I'm not mad at you, I'm just reacting this way because your leaving. It's hard okay, not being able to see you every morning, not being able to kiss you, not being able to feel your touch, all of that is really hard", Luke "I know it is baby, it's hard for me too. I don't wanna leave you or our kids, I can't stand being away from you, this is my job. I'm not doing this on purpose, but just remember the song because I will come back home. There is no reason for me not too, I have an amazing wife, and two silly kids that I get to come home to", Cassie "how is this gonna go, Ava doesn't know. She has school tomorrow and when she gets back from school you won't be here", Luke "we just have to tell her", Cassie "so she can cry", Luke "she's gonna find out sooner or later", Cassie "Ava Marie come here please", Ava "yes momma", Cassie "come sit with me and daddy please", Ava "why are you sad mommy", Cassie "you tell her I'm not telling her", Luke "so baby girl, daddy's gotta go away for a while for work, it's just gonna be you, mommy and Jayden", I saw the pain in Ava's eyes as she broke down in tears, her around wrapping around Luke, I could see the pain in his eyes as well and he didn't like it. Ava "I don't want you to go daddy", Luke "I know you don't, it's for work baby girl", Ava cried hysterically for about an hour or two, she cried so much she put herself to sleep. I couldn't help but cry after I put her in bed, Luke wrapped his arms around me, it was hard for all of us, I didn't want him to leave. For the afternoon we spent sitting on the couch cuddled with Luke, Ava had dance again so Luke insisted on taking her.
