Selfless Love

The Storm

"Son," Riftan whispered, trying not to wake his wife and daughter, "what's wrong?" 

The cries quieted as the child tried to hold in his emotions, attempting to put on a brave face for his father, his hero.  

"I-I am okay-y," Andrew choked out as he tried to hold in another sob.  

Riftan reached over and placed his hand on his son's head. He gently rubbed Andrew's head in an effort to console the boy.  

"Andrew," Riftan said in a slightly firmer tone, "what's bothering you?" 

The small boy began to tremble as he was still trying as hard as he could not to cry in front of his father. Riftan reached over and easily picked up the boy and laid him on his chest. He said a silent prayer of thanks that his wife and daughter had remained sound asleep. He wrapped his arms around his son and gave him a firm reassuring hug. That hug snapped the last tread of the child's already thin resolve who began weeping in his father's arms.  

"I am sorry I was afraid," the boy choked out between sobs. "I don't know why but it reminds me of our prison cell, and I hate it. I hate it that I couldn't do more to protect mom and- " his words trailed off as his body was overwhelmed by another wave of sobs.  

Riftan waited until the boy's cries had quieted down, and his body relaxed a little so that he knew his son would be able to pay attention.  

"I'm sorry too, son," Riftan said, a thick layer of regret laced in his usually calm tone. "I'm sorry the storm reminds you of that terrible place. I'm sorry that you were put in that position in the first place. And I'm sorry I couldn't rescue you and your mother sooner. It is a regret I will carry for the rest of my days." 

There was a long silence before the boy spoke again. Riftan had to strain to hear the child's quiet voice above the loud storm that continued to rage outside their tent.  

"I know Dad, but I still feel sorry for being afraid," the boy said softly, as though he were guilty. "I know I shouldn't be afraid. At this rate I know I'll never be as brave as you. You aren't afraid of anything, you've never been afraid- " 

"That's not true, Andrew," Riftan interrupted. "I have been afraid before and there are still things in this world that make me afraid." 
Another long moment of silence stretched between the father and son as Andrew tried to process Riftan's words.

"What!" he exclaimed. "Impossible! Nothing scares you! You're fearless! And one day I hope I can be half as fearless as you!" 

Riftan couldn't fight the smile that graced his lips as his son admitted to him that he, Riftan, was a role model for his son. His brows furrowed as he realized his tendency to mask his emotions had left an unhealthy standard for his son to try to match. He didn't want Andrew to bottle his emotions, Riftan knew from personal experience that it would not end well if he tried.  

"I hope I can always be there to provide you with wisdom and guidance son," Riftan began. "But I think I may have set the bar too high. I have fears but I don't show them because I have to remain steadfast so that my comrades will remain calm. I don't let my emotions overwhelm me, but it doesn't mean that they're not there. It's perfectly normal to be afraid but what you don't want is for those fears to consume you. To do that you need to do your best to stay calm and focus on what grounds you." 

Riftan helped his son practice taking deep breaths and focus on what helped him stay calm. Andrew thought of home and the secure feeling he felt when he was surrounded by his family. The young boy seemed to relax a little after that. 

Riftan thought his son was almost asleep when the young child asked, "Dad, what made you scared?"  

Riftan took a deep breath trying to think of the best way to explain his fear to a small child. After a long pause, Riftan answered his son's question.  

"I was scared that I would not make it in time to rescue you and your mother," Riftan admitted. "I was afraid I would be too late. I cannot be everywhere at once and I'm afraid one day you or your sister or your mother might get hurt because I wasn't quick enough to protect you." 

Andrew's jaw dropped and his eyes grew wide. He could hardly believe that his father, a man who had taken down the fierce dragon Sector without hesitation, had just admitted to being afraid.  

"Really, Dad?" he asked, just to make sure he had understood him correctly.  

"Yes," Riftan said calmly. "Nothing is more important to me than keeping our family safe. It's okay to be afraid son, as long as you don't let the fear overwhelm you. Try to stay calm like I showed you earlier." 

"Okay Dad," Andrew said quietly.  

"It's okay to be scared." Riftan reassured him, easily detecting his son's embarrassment. Andrew's face was pressed up against his chest and he could feel his son's face heating up. Though it was dark, he would bet that Andrew's cheeks were a bright pink. He would deny it, but the boy was easily flustered just like his mother. "If you are ever truly scared son, come tell me, okay? We will always be here for you. I won't let anything hurt you, Andrew. I promise."  

"Mom can protect me too," Andrew pointed out, almost boasting; he was proud that his mother was strong too.  

Riftan smiled an almost bittersweet smile. He was proud of the strong, capable wizard his wife had become but it didn't mean he still didn't worry every time she put herself in harm's way. He knew she had fought like hell when she was held captive. She had done what any mother would do, do everything she could to protect and nurture her child. Riftan would never be able to put to words how in awe he was of her determination and bravery. She had grown more independent since her captivity, which Riftan understood to an extent, but it never stopped him from worrying about her. He didn't know if he would ever stop worrying.  

"She is afraid too," the boy continued, unaware his father was lost in thought. Andrew's statement brought him back to the present. 

"What do you mean?" Riftan asked worriedly. He had worked so hard to make sure their family was safe. If Maximilian's fear was obvious to their son, then he must have missed something. 

"Of course, Dad," Andrew replied as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "She worries about our safety too, especially yours." 

Riftan chuckled at his son's words. Here he was worrying about his wife's occasional recklessness while he was admittedly just as reckless himself, if not more so.  

As though she could sense them talking about her, Maxi groaned in her sleep as she stirred slightly beneath the blankets. Riftan reached out his hand to gently rub her shoulder to calm her. She instantly relaxed under his soothing touch and settled back down holding their daughter a little tighter against her as she slept.  

He returned his hand back on his son's back and gently rubbed the child's back. Andrew fought in vain to keep his eyes open. His head lay on his father's firm chest and his steady heartbeat soothed the last of the young boy's fears. 

"Good night," Andrew said with a sleepy yawn.  

"Good night," Riftan echoed. 

The boy wiggled slightly trying to get more comfortable. Riftan rolled onto his side, still holding his son. He shared part of his pillow with Andrew and his son snuggled against him not wanting to let go. Feeling them shift Maxi moved closer and nestled against her son's back.  

For the first time that night, Andrew felt completely safe, lying between his parents and sister. He knew they would do anything to protect him, and they would keep him safe.  

"I love you Daddy," Andrew whispered right before he fell into a deep sleep.  

Riftan felt his heart skip a beat at his son's sincere words. It wasn't the first time his son had told him he loved him, but he couldn't help the way his heart would nearly burst with joy whenever he heard Andrew say those three simple but powerful words.  

Riftan took a moment to look at his beautiful family. His wife's beauty could surpass that of any of heaven's angels. She was beautiful, brave, kind, and stubborn as hell. She had given him two perfect children whom he loved more than anything in this world. He thanked the heavens every morning and night for blessing someone so undeserving with the priceless blessings of his wonderful family.  

"I love you too, Andrew."