Stupid irondad/spiderson oneshots

Tony stark terrorises the pta

Tony Stark was not the type of man to 'care' about stuff, he certainly wasn't the fatherly type. Or- that's what the media said. Peter knew the truth. And the truth was that Tony Stark was a helicopter parent. He had more 'baby monitor' protocols than Peter could count, the moment Peter got injured Tony was there with a plaster and an ice pack. Anytime Peter fell ill, Tony was there with hot soup and hugs.
In other words, he was an amazing dad.
(albeit embarrassing)

And that leads us to where we are now. With Tony Stark himself organising a school bake sale.
—-----
It started on a tuesday. Peter was woken up by Friday, went back to sleep, was yelled at by Steve to get up, woke up late then got sidetracked as spiderman and was an hour late to school.

As he ran into his second period English class his teacher sighed.
"Thank you for finally gracing us with your presence mr parker. Detention after school."
She scolded as Peter sat down.
He tried his best to ignore the sniggers and whispers surrounding him but alas that was all he could hear, at least it was mildly funny if not completely mortifying that 50% of the people in the school thought he was either a gang member or a prostitute.

After class, his teacher- Miss peterson- called for him to stay behind.

"Mr parker."
"Yes, miss?" Peter gulped.

"Unfortunately, the frequencies of your absences are inexcusable and principal Morita will have to phone home. It's your choice whether you want to be there for the call or not."

"Yes miss," Peter sighed, knowing that this would be a shitshow.

"Now get to break."

"Yes miss." Peter replied again, rushing out to find Ned and complain about his life.
—------
Principal Morita sat in front of Peter with a solemn expression.
"I'm sorry it's come to this Mr Parker, but we had no choice. These absences can't go on. Understand?"

"Yes sir." Peter sighed, maintaining a bored expression. Inside however he was fully panicking. What if Mr Stark took away his suit again? What if he sent him back to foster care? What if-
The phone stopped ringing.

"Hello hello, billionaire playboy philanthropist Tony Stark at your disposal?" Tony answered. Peter wanted to dig himself into a hole and never come out again.

Principal morita stuttered, looking at peter incredulously

"R-right um im calling on behalf of peter parker? I'm his headmaster.

"Ahh what has he done now?"

"I'd just like to inquire into the large amount of absences Peter has taken."

"Those? Well you know- teenagers. He knows all the material already so I don't see the problem."

"Well if it continues Mr Parker will have to be held back a year to make up."
Peter internally short-circuited. Held back a year? He was going to die.

"Says who?"
Peter put his head in his hands. He hated mr stark.

"The- the PTA introduced the rule recently, sir." Principal Morita looked thoroughly terrified.

"Well i'll join it then and get rid of it. Peter is studying online for his mit classes and is frequently needed to do stuff for his internship during school hours- pepper should have sent over the documents?"
Oh god.
"Um-" principal morta was lost for words.
"Then it's settled. Pete's absences are authorised and i'll be showing up for the next PTA meeting. When is that?"

"Its on- on friday after school, sir."

"Thanks! Also would you like Thai or Italian for dinner underoos?"
The question caught peter off guard, so he stuttered out a quiet
"Italian please mr stark."