Only Him | Shrek x reader x lord farquaad

1. Buddy Holly (Taylors version)

Maybe my marriage to shrek was sudden. My mom certainly thought so.

"I just think you're going a little too fast, hun. You've only known this man- this OGRE, for a year-"

"Mom please, if I wanted your opinion I would've asked to get married. I'm telling you, Shrek proposed and I said yes."  Mom never understood me. She always nagged me and was overprotective. Even after my teenage years I found myself rebelling against my mother's wishes.

"(Y/N)! I am your mother, I know we've never seen eye to eye but is 'Shrek' really the best for you? He's an OGRE, you know how ogres are! Sorcerers and ogres never got along well, it's just common sense!" I flip my hair and roll my eyes, this is why I never talk to my mom.

"Mom, nobody likes sorcerers other than other sorcerers! Not fairies, mermaids, gnomes, princes or princesses-"

"Which is exactly why I recommended you to just spell a man to love you. You know that was going to be my plan B if your father didn't love me."

"You and dad divorced after like two years."

"Not my point. I refuse to have you married to a disgusting ogre!"

Despite that, she showed up at my wedding. Crying, but at least she showed up.

Shrek was wearing a very handsome white suit, on the back was amazing embroidery that said "Homosexuals for Bruce Wayne" surrounded by red heart patches I hand sewn on.

Our wedding was beautiful. It was outside Shrek's swamp, and although my clothes were muddied and the food was inedible to normal people, and our marriage was not officiated by a real priest (Rather it was my mom's fifth ex boyfriend; Joseph Quinn), it was the best day of my life. Apart from when I met Shrek, buts that's a story for a different day.

~

I woke up feeling well rested, "Good morning baby." I say while I'm stretching.

"Good morning my chocolate caramel Chanel honeybun cupcake sweetie-pie dollop muffin." Shrek cooed, I batted my long sexy eyelashes at him and giggled. I blush as shrek kisses me.

Today, Shrek insisted on making breakfast. While he was busy in the kitchen making pickled bullfrog bacon and dodo eggs, I went to the outhouse.

When I opened the front door I was shocked to see a wicker basket filled with flowers on our doorstep.

I picked up the basket, noticing a note on it. It read; 'TO THE HOTTEST SORCERER IN THE KINGDOM 🥵🥵', It was written in the most horrible cursive I had ever seen too. 'from: DADDY FARQUAAD'.

"Oh. Em. Gee." I proceed to scream so loudly that the egg Shrek was cooking popped.

Shrek came rushing to the door, "What?! What happened!?" I just stare at the note in my hand.

"O-Oh it's uh nothing it's just," I crumple the note and hide it in my fist "It's a gift from my mom, she wishes us a happy anniversary."

Shreks expression went sour, "Your mother hates that we're together."

"I know! That's why I screamed, she never even brought a present for our wedding." I sigh "And the divorce papers don't count. I don't even know how she got them,"