𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫, 𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗶𝘀𝘀

𝟎𝟗𝟐

"I don't know, babe," Emily says, making Noah wiggle out of her mother's hold and walk to the staircase, "Noah!"

"I don't wanna talk about it!" The teen shouts and stomps up to her room. She slams her door shut, making Emily sigh to herself and rub her temples.

Noah sits in her bedroom on the floor with her back leaning on her bed frame. She covers her face with her hands and groans. She takes a few deep breaths, thinking to herself.

She did not mean to get so worked up. She did not mean to yell at Emily or cause a scene over something the mother was not even implying. She wishes she had chosen a different way to react, but she could not stop herself. She physically could not make her mouth or brain stop — like she had no choice but to yell and get it out.

She wonders if that was what Gia used to feel.  If her yelling and aggression were a trigger that she had to pull.  They may not have been related by blood, but they had similarities and Noah never realized it until now.

Before she can spiral, Noah changes into her pyjamas and gets into bed, hoping to shut down her mind for the night.

—
𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕟𝕖𝕩𝕥 𝕒𝕗𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕟𝕠𝕠𝕟
𝘥𝘳. 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱𝘩𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘰𝘯'𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘦

"What's been triggering these flashbacks?" The doctor asks.

"I can't help but think that if my mother saw me now, she would actually kill me," Noah sighs.

"I thought you told me not to refer to Gia as your mother."

"Well, she was when the flashbacks took place," Noah notes.

"Why would she kill you if she saw you now?" Dr. Stephenson questions.

"Because everything my life has become, she would just despise," The teen says as she shakes her head, "She would hate that I'm so affectionate with Emily. She would never approve of me having a therapist.  And she would just absolutely lose it if she knew about Jess."

"What about Jess?"

"Just...Jess, in general," Noah shrugs.

"From what I gather, you and Jess are close friends," The doctor says, "What about her would make Gia so upset?"

The teen looks down at her shoes and goes silent. The doctor takes a deep breath as he sees her trying to close herself off.

"Noah, remember how we talked about what you get out of this depends on what you put into it? If you don't wanna talk about it, we don't have to, but if it's bothering you and triggering these memories, I'd like to help."

Noah nods. She does it more to herself, giving herself the green light to go back to her childhood.

"When I was younger, Gia shockingly let me have friends over sometimes. And I think she thought nothing of it because it just got me out of her hair for a couple hours and the parents would be able to tell the social worker that their kid had a great time visiting us. But there was one time when I had a friend over and that friend liked me. So, one day, we were in my room after school and that friend kissed me. And, of course, Gia saw it and literally almost killed me."

"So, Gia was against affection?"

"Not really."

"What do you think her issue was about, then?"

"Well, that friend was a girl."

"So, Gia was against you liking a girl?"

"Not a girl, any girl — girls in general," Noah says as she almost laughs at the thought of it, "And you know what? I don't even blame her. I mean, really, look at the world we live in. Did you know same-sex marriage is illegal in Virginia?"