New Beginnings

Act 3 ch 3

"What?" Victoria asks laughing. "That's right. Your sister had these little oshkosh cords and they were way too big and once at the mall they fell down and I said whoa there droopy drawers and I'm just afraid that if we don't answer everything accurately the Harvard police will come and hit her with an atlas and say something mean in Latin" Lorelai tells the story.

"How would they know that you called me droopy drawers?" Rory asks. "Well, we could be at a Harvard event, and I'd accidentally say, pass me the lobster puffs droopy drawers. And they'll hear me, and that'll be that" Lorelai answers. "How about you don't drink at any of these Harvard events?" Victoria suggests.

"Okay, parental information, mother. Breathtaking" Lorelai goes back to the applications.

"I think they just want your name" Rory says. "Father. Ostracized" Lorelai continues.

"Personal statement" she reads. "Oh, the essay, the big kahuna" Victoria says not looking forward to the part. "You can evaluate a significant experience that's had an impact on you, how about that time when your drawers dropped at the mall?" Lorelai turns to Rory.

"Enough with the drawers" Rory tells her.

"Or you could write about a person who's had a significant influence on you" Lorelai says. "You?" Rory asks.

"Or one of your authors, Faulkner" Lorelai suggests. "Or Sylvia Plath?" Rory asks. "Might send the wrong message" Victoria points out.

"The sticking her head in the oven thing?" Rory asks her.

"Yeah" Victoria answers. "Well who are you writing about?" Rory asks.

"I think I'm doing the significant experience" Victoria tells her. "Okay, I just crunched the numbers and at 2,000 words and 25 cents a work this stupid ad's gonna cost $500! That's five months of minwaxing end table at the store" Lane complains coming back out of the bedroom. "I give up" she sighs.

"No, don't give up. Just cut down your influences to the most important ones" Victoria says.

"Yeah, like with David Bowie" Rory says taking the list. "Gotta have Bowie" Lane insists.

"But do you have to list every album he recorded and your personal rating between one and ten?" Rory asks her. "Maybe not" Lane admits. "And what's with Jackson Browne making the list?" Lorelai asks.

"Ah, see cool people know he's more than a mellow, hippie-dippie folkie, that he actually wrote some of Nico's best songs and was her lover before he bored us with Doctor My Eyes. That will separate the posers from the non posers" Lane explains.

"Wax on, wax off" Rory says giving Lane back the list. "I hate this" Lane complains storming back to Rory's room.

"Okay, what activities interest you?" Victoria says taking an application. "All except sports" Rory replies. "I thought you were the lacrosse kid" Lorelai says.

"Mom, just a modicum of seriousness as we do this would be appreciated" Rory tells her.

"They want a picture" Victoria says still looking through the application. "How about the one of the two of you  sticking your heads through the holes of Johnny Bravo and SpongeBob SquarePants" Lorelai suggests.

"There's the seriousness I crave" Rory's says. "I'm going to have to crank the Ramones if I have to make deep cuts" Lane warns them before turning up the music. "We'll move outside" Victoria sighs getting up.

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"Are you sure you don't want me going with you tonight? You know Rory will be late right?" Victoria asks her mother while getting ready for school.