Hes my light (being edited)

Chapter 10- fight

"BECAUSE I CANT." I shouted at her, releasing the feelings I swore to keep hidden. "Because you drive me fucking crazy, your beautiful and kind. And all you show me is kindness. when I slept with you In my arms I didn't have any nightmares for the first time since it happened. You calm me down. Is that what you want to hear?"

"Do you mean that?" she asked with an emotion in her eyes I haven't seen.

"Yeah I do." I sighed.

"I feel the same. Your touch is calming. I don't have as many nightmares as I used to when I'm here. With you. You make me feel safe and happy. When you pay attention to me which is all I want." she smiled softly.

"You mean that?" I found myself asking.

"Yeah, and they are completely sober words."

with out a second thought I grabbed her waist smashing my lips on to hers, she didn't hesitate to kiss me back. Her kiss was just as needy and rough as mine, I wrapped my hand around her neck slightly applying pressure which earned me a soft moan, i took that as an opportunity to slip my tongue into her mouth earning another moan.

Our kiss was passionate and spoke all the words we couldn't say. I explored her mouth with my tongue, tasting the residue of alcohol. I craved her, I craved this. She is pure ecstasy and now that I finally have a taste I'll be addicted. She  pulled away from me and trailed kissed down my jaw to my neck sucking so hard I'm sure it left a mark. She continued to suck on my neck making a throaty groan slip past my lips.

"Fuck Sienna." I rasped.

I grabbed her chin forcing her head to the side giving me more access to her neck I kissed down her jaw to her neck sucking just as hard as she did to me, her sent of strawberry's and roses overwhelmed my senses and all I could smell,see, hear and feel was her. All of her. And I wasn't complaining.

I pushed my knee in between her thighs and griped her ass pulling her closer. I continued leaving marks in specific places on her neck and when I was done I leaned back, I smirked when I saw the A formed in marks on her neck.

"Ash, can I sleep in your room tonight?" She asked breathlessly leaning her forehead on mind.

"I'd like that." I replied just as out of breath as her.

I took her hand and led her out of the hallway and back to the bar where I was before. everyone was gathered there now including Nic and Ari who were all over each other.

"Happy birthday Toniiiiii." Slurred Sienna from beside me.

He smiled lazily are her sipping on his rum.

"I'm tried and too drunk for this let's go home."Matteo suggested looking Sienna and I up and down. I nodded in agreement and motioned to the back door where we came in. We all weaved through the ocean of dancing body's, I felt Sienna squeeze tighter on my hand and pulling her self toward me. I skip my arm up her waist pulling her in to my side.

"Are you ok?" I asked with worry laced in my words even if I didn't want it to.

"Y-yeah I thought I saw someone." she told me, but they sounded like empty words. I'll ask her when we're home. We're. I'm starting to like the sound of those words. I nodded hugging her tighter to my side and rubbing little circles on her hip.
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We got home all went our separate words to change.I walked into my bedroom heading to my closet and picking out a pair of grey sweats. I pulled the black T-shirt I was wearing over my head along with the jeans. leaving the closet I headed to the bathroom where I kept the pain killers, I poured a couple into my hand I took two for my self and left one on my bed side table for Sienna.

I sat on the edge of the bed waiting for her when I heard a soft knock on the door.

"Come in." I replied softly.

"Hey." I looked up but saw her still in her dress, although her make up and jewelry was all taken off. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion when she walked over to the chair I had near the window. She smiled sheepishly grabbing a pile of clothes and leaving the room again. When she returned she was wearing small black shorts and my black T-shirt.

"Is that mine?" I asked walking to stand in front of her.

"Maybe.. I kept them from last time accidentally and the ones from the night we moved in. Your not getting them back it's comfortable." She crossed her arms against her chest giving me a glare.

I chuckled at her sassiness and also at my own stupidness for loving the fact she wears them.  I looked into her eyes which lit up suddenly.

"What?"

"Do that again!" She smiled getting closer.

"Do what?" I was genuinely confused.

"That laugh. Do it again."

"What? Why?"

"Because I like the sound of it." she said happily. I love her smile and seeing her happy. Oh god. Am I... falling for her? No. Right?

"Hey, this is the stab wound scar right?" she asked tracing the scar left behind on my lower abdomen. Her fingers softly tan across it causing my breath to hitch.

"Yeah." I gently grabbed her wrist pulling her toward the bed. But her entire mood changed she was staring at my hand when she said.

"Shit. How could I forget. I'm sorry." And with that she turned around.

"What? Where are you going?" My eyebrows scrunched together with confusion.

"Your girlfriend." She mumbled with her head down slightly kicking the floor.

"Girlfriend? Where did you get that idea?" Did one of the guys tell her that? They all know I don't do relationships and never wanted to.. until her. The one infront of me.

"Her." She pointed at the hand I had wrapped around her wrist. I followed her pointing finger to the name on my knuckles. Katie.

"she was my sister. Not my girlfriend." I told her. All the pain flooded back with that one name.

"Was.. I'm sorry I didn't know." she looked guilty.

"It's ok, she was killed years ago." I shrugged. "Bed now?" I asked trying to change the subject.

"Is that where your nightmares come from?" I froze. How did she-

"How do you know that?" I growled lowly feeling anger creep up my neck.

"I wasn't sure where your nightmares came from.. I was only assuming, I'm sorry I shouldn't have crossed that line." she whispered from behind me. I sighed. Theres no reason to get mad at her she did nothing,

"Ash. I hope you know I'm here if you want to talk. If you'll let me I'd like to know more about you." I felt her arms slip around my bare torso and her cheek press on the middle of my back.

"I want to know more about you to, especially who you thought you saw at the club that had you so shaken." I felt her body tense around me.

"Ok.." she dropped her arms and crawled in bed, noticing the pain killer she took that too. She patted the side beside her. I crawled in under the covered with her. And started to tell her my most vulnerable feelings.
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So what do you think of this chapter?
I'm sorry if the kiss wasn't detailed enough or good, I'm trying my best I haven't written anything like this especially smut. Lmao. Anyway I hope you liked it anyway <3