Fatuous Death.

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4:30 PM, Present Day

Nagito POV:

     Fuck. I walk briskly, Your going to cry trash~ I speed-walk briskly. He said it again. "I love you." He'll realize, He'll realize I'm not worth it once I'm gone. And that's when I realized I'd decided. I'm done. Its time I turn my brain off. I'm going to bring hope to everyone, the ultimate's will confront the despair of my death and rise to hope! Now I just have to commit suicide to do it ooo suicide~ for once, the voice in my head and me are in sync. I don't hate it? don't lie to yourself I hate it. But I settle, cause I'll shut it up soon. I accelerate, my shoes squeaking as I run full speed to my dorm. My jacket whips my arms, my cuts, as I run, and it hurts. My feet jam into the front of my shoes as I run, and it hurts. The air stings my lungs as I run, and it hurts. It hurts, It hurts, it hurts. "Hajime..." I think, and tears sting the back of my eyes. It hurts. My heart seizes in on itself, my lungs feel their about to collapse, why am I running? I slow and I stare up. I'm at the dorm rooms now. "Its tall..." I think. "Tall enough too..." No. I could never disgrace this holy academy with my blood. I shake my head, trying to clear it like an etch-a-sketch. I reach my arm out and push open the door.

     Before long I'm in my room, thinking. My grades have always said I'm actually pretty smart, despite everything. Its probably just my luck though, no way trash like me is smart... Wait. Something catches my eye, a pamphlet, something I had discarded on my desk for dead. (AN: *cough* PLOT CONVENIENCE *cough*) There's a picture of a bridge on the front, a tall bridge. I reach and pick it up, soft paper meeting my fingertips. Apparently their still constructing it, a new bridge a couple miles from here, and their hyping up its arrival. "Its... perfect." I say softly. This, this is really it. Its really it. Say goodbye bitch, no one liked you anyway. Its true... You think this is even going to mean anything, you said it yourself, they'll be even more hope when your gone! I know... It was all useless, your useless, dying's going to be the most worthwhile thing you've done in your life Nagito. "FOR FUCKS SAKE I KNOW!!" I actually scream it out loud this time, and I'm glad that Hajime is not in the room next door. I laugh a little, chuckling. Thoughts running rampant through my head I move back out the door. "Weights" I mumble through giggling. "Weights will make me sink faster..." The past rules my mind in that moment like a dictator. "See the way he laughed? Screws loose with that one I swear..." I hear a voice from my past say. "I hear he set off the bomb in the cafeteria! Something about disrupting injustice and inspiring hope. He's suck a freak!" I shove my hands in my pockets as I head to the gym. "Dude whose that?" Said one boy to his friend on the first day of Hopes Peak. "Duno, but daymnn, has he ever slept, or breathed even? He looks like he just crawled from the grave. Freaky." Freak. Freaky. Ugly. Psychotic. Unstable. I don't blame anyone, they're all true words. All through my childhood, even my own mother, no one wanted anything to do with a trashy freak-a-zoid like me. Now, no will ever have too. Because while I contemplated the past, I also made it to the gym.

     Lucky me, none of my classmates are inside. Just two guys I think are from the class below us, class 78. They wont know me. I push the door open to the gym. "So I'll help you with this kinda stuff, and you'll teach that god-awful fuckin algebra, plus we get to spent time tog-" The strangely haired one turns to stare at me, and I think I've met someone now whose hair makes less sense than mine does. He has a fourteen-eighteen inch pompadour sticking out from his head, and for a moment all I can think about is how much hair gel he must use. He looks like he's about to swear and punch me, but then he remembers the dude next to him, and that seems to stop me from getting beat to death. "Greetings!" His friend says to me. What an odd pair... "Hi" I say back, and head over to the weights. There's no way I'm going to be able to carry these all the way to the bridge site without help... I scan the room and my eyes lock on a wooden crate in the corner. I walk over and pick it up, and fill it with two weights that look heavy. I've never worked out before, even putting these two weights in the crate makes my bones feel like they're chaffing each other. It hurts. "Fucker, what do you think your doing? You gotta start small, those are way to big for you." The burly one apparently objects to what I'm doing, and he's right these would be to big for me if I was working out. "I'll be fine, these are the ones I need." I grunt, and I lift the crate, luckily I know enough to lift with my back. I feel my spine pop as I stand up, and it makes a popping noise. "My ass you'll be fine! Shrimp like you could kill yourself with those." The moment he says that I start laughing, not just chuckling, but full on scream laughing. His word choice was perfect. "I guess I could, I'll be careful." I say to him, and he looks so confused, I don't think he understood anything about the situation. "Thanks!" I say cheerfully, and I head out the door. Off to the bridge, I head for the bus stop. No car for me, I failed my drivers test.

Almost 6 P.M., Present Day

     Nervous ticks emerge as I wait for the bus. I scratch my arms as I wait for what seems like forever, the box of weights sitting beside me. My sweater is still on me, but It doesn't matter anymore if I rip it, maybe Hajime might keep it as a keepsake of me, that would be cute. I decide briefly that I'll leave it behind before I plunge. To preserve it a little, I try to stop shredding it with my nails. The screech of tires and clunking of mechanics starts to reach my ears, so I assume the buss is almost here. I pick up the box and stare down the street as the long probably warm bus comes nearer. Its just now that I realize its really cold outside, wind whistling around me like a cyclone of ice. The waters even colder~ Yeah. You cant swim with weights~ That's kinda the point. You sure about this?~ I'm done questioning. Shut up, even if you don't, I'll make you. Sassy. Alright. The bus screeches, so loud and so close it hurts my ears. But I heave my weights up and climb the steps. "Ticket?" Says the bus driver in a monotone voice. Damn. I didn't buy one. Just then, my school ID falls out of my pocket into the crate I'm holstering in front of me, right for the driver to see. "Oh," he begins "Hopes Peak kid. We have one of you on already, you hard working kids ride free. Where you headed?" It may be a stupid talent, but sometimes my SHSL luck really pulls through. "The bridge please." I say politely. "At this time of night?" He replies quizzically, I guess it is an odd request, but when I reply with an "Mhm!" and a smile, he doesn't ask any more questions. 

     He said there was another student here too, I wonder... I scan the buss for anyone I know, but no one I know sticks out. I settle on a red haired kid in the back, the only person on the mostly empty buss who looks my age. He must also be one of the younger class 78 kids. "They just keep popping up, what active ultimate's!" I admire them, they just keep working and working. I sit semi-close to the boy, he has a white leather jacket on and looks like he's waiting for someone to question him. As I sit down he looks me over and finally asks, "Your a hopes peak kid? Don't look familiar. To bad though, when the bus driver was sayin' there was a hopes peak kid gettin on I was hoping for a babe." He chuckles here. Must be a straight guy. Interesting. When I don't chuckle with him he adds, "No offense though. Your ah-" God I gotta say something before this conversation gets any more awkward. Small talk. "No offense taken!" I say lightly "I may not look it, but I'm taken anyway." Thaaat was the wrong thing to say. HA! Awkward bastard. that was the weirdest thing you could have said, he's obviously not flirting. Shut Up! "Oh!" he replies enthusiastically. "Got yourself a babe huh? How are the class 77 chicks?" "ah-" I start. This could not be going worse. I wish I'd killed myself sooner just to avoid this conversation. This guy really likes his women. "He's, well. Ah." I don't know what to say. The light seems to fade from the red gotte'd mans eyes. Does he dye his goatee? "Ah." he said awkwardly, and I think he gets it now. "That's cool, I mean we support, I mean, ah." Why does this have to exist?!? I'm wishing my stop was here already and to my luck the buss screeches again, and I can see a bridge outside the window. "See ya." I mumble to the guy and he gives me another surprised look before saying "See ya" back. I start to get up, but he finishes his sentence by saying "Hey, what's your name?" I look at him again and move my cheeks up, forcing a smile as cold night air rushes onto the bus from the now open doors. "Nagito Komaeda." "I'm Leon Kuwata. Nice to meet 'cha." I nod my head at him and begin to leave, dragging my feet on the metal buss floor. I just met a guy for the fist and last time. If all goes as planned, I'll never see him again.

AN:  Tid-bit on where Leon was going, he was heading to a club to try and sing/rap onstage for the first time! That may or may not be relevant later. Next chapter is the big moment, you ready? Sorry about how long its taking, been kinda struggling lately. But making this is fun, so Imma finish it >:D Anyway thanks for reading, this wasn't the best chapter but I still worked on it, I hope you enjoyed! Enjoy the next chapter!

𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴, 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 ~𝙆𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙖Donde viven las historias. Descúbrelo ahora