Chasing Cars

Chapter One

first person (Evelyn/Ivy)

"Saan ka na, En?" Napalingon ako sa gawi na kung saan nanggagaling ang boses.

"Bilisan mo naman, tol! Yung bagong kasal dito walang sapatos, baka pasayawin mo pa ng nakapaa!" I chuckled. Who is this man talking to?

He looks very stressed but the way that he's shouting and bantering with the other person on the line was entertaining for us. He's talking about... shoes? Something about shoes.

Napalingon ulit ako ng biglang bumukas ang mga pintuan. May anyo ng isang lalaki sa harap nito.

"Holy shit, I'm sorry. Someone rear-ended me on the way," oh my god. No way. "Here's the shoes, they're size 11. Pakibigay kay Jake and also tell him I'm sorry for bringing it so late."

It's him. It feels like I just got a whiplash. Out of all the places in the world, sa kasal pa talaga kami magkikita ulit? Ang cliche, sobra!

"Ivy... isn't that Kenji?"

Oo, nakikita ko may mata ako!

I was staring at him without even realizing it but I was too stunned to care. Suddenly, all the emotions and the feelings I thought were long gone came rushing. It all feels like it was yesterday.

"Huy, tangina, Ivy! Nakatitig ka dyan, nakakahiya! He's looking back at you, please stop," bigla akong natauhan sa sinabi ni Kiran. I immediately looked back down and acted like i was looking at my nails. It's a very half ass cover but at least I tried.

"Let's go to our seat. Baka magsayaw na sila," I hurriedly went to my assigned seat with Kiran and Hana. I don't think I would've been able to handle another second being in the same area as him.

"Ivy, hindi ko ine-expect na makikita ko si Kenji dito. Did you know he was coming?" Tanong ni Hana. Hello! Muka bang alam ko? If I knew he was coming, sana nagdala ako ng jowa! Obviously, I didn't know!

"No, Ava never told me she invited him. I don't think Jake knows him either," it's not like Ava knows about me and Kenji. Ava was one of our groupmates pero it's not like we were close enough let her know about Kenji. This whole thing was not publicly known at all.

"Well, he's here either way," Hana shrugs. "What are you planning on doing?"

"About what? Alam naman nating lagi na lang wrong timing pag dating sa dalawang yan," Kiran scoffs. She's not wrong pero what's that supposed to mean?

Napamasahe ako sa ulo ko. "Nothing, I'm not gonna do anything," I firmly said. "This thing with Kenji is in the past and I'm not going back in time. Alam nyo yan."

I've made my decision a long time ago. I'm not going back on my word, never have and never will. I decided to keep this stupid feelings for myself the day I realized it existed. I couldn't afford to lose him. He is— or was, my friend.

"Are you sure, Ivy? We all know na kahit gaano man katagal na ang nakalipas, e gusto mo parin si Ken–" napatigil sa pagsasalita si Kiran nang biglang may mga lalaking umupo sa table namin.

I looked at who sat in our table and, of course, it's him! Ang gandang bungad. Why am I even surprised? This always happens! Lagi na lang. May galit yata ang mundo sakin.

I gave Hana and Kiran a look, trying to tell them not to utter a single word about it.

But I didn't expect both of them to not say a single word at all. Two minutes pass and the awkwardness and tension is heavy on the table. Pinatahimik ko lang naman sila about sa pinaguusapan namin. Hindi ko sinabing itahi nila bunganga nila for the whole time.

Sinipa ko sa ilalim ng lamesa si Hana, trying to tell her to say something because at this point, Kenji's stares was too much for me to handle.

"Hi, I guess you guys are the ones sitting with us for tonight," Hana smiled and introduced herself first. Then, Kiran and me, finally.

"Yes, we are. This is Kenji," tinuro ng lalaki si Kenji na nakatingin lamang sakin. I gave him a quick awkward smile and look and immediately turned my focus on something else. I could still feel his stares.

"This is Marco and I'm Ryan. Nice to meet you guys," Ryan and Marco shook all our hands and gave us a smile. Nakatuon pa din ang atensyon ni Kenji sakin.

"Hope we all get along and enjoy the event," Kiran gave them a sweet smile.

Akala ko ay gagaan na ang mga tingin ni Kenji pero hindi. Mas tumutok pa ang atensyon nya sakin ng sobra. Bigla akong naging santo dito at nagdasal ng sobra sobra.

Mukang napansin naman ito ni Ryan kaya't inakbayan nya si Kenji. "Kenji, mukang kilala mo si Evelyn 'ha?" Ryan laughed, trying to relieve the tension but it did not help. Nakatingin pa din sya sakin! Fuck naman lord, shit.

"Yes, I do know Eve," Kenji took Ryan's arms off his shoulders. "We're friends," he looked at me with... hopeful eyes. "Diba?"

I know what he wants to hear and, unfortunately, I gave in. "Yes, yes we are." I looked backed at Ryan and gave him a warm, reassuring smile.

Bitch, what the fuck! Did he just call me 'Eve'? I haven't heard that name in years! Tangina, I did not sign up for this! I came here to see my friend celebrate her union with the love of her life, hindi para titigan nang isang taong hindi ko naman alam na pupunta pala. Kinakabahan ako sa mga tingin nya. Wala din akong magawa dahil sobrang awkward ng atmosphere at sobrang tagal na naming hindi nagkikita't naguusap. Mahigit tatlong taon na din.

I couldn't take it anymore. I stood up and excused myself to go to the bathroom. The tension between us was just too much. He was not letting my glimpses escape. I felt trapped. Nakakasakal ang mga titig nya. I had to leave.

I walked towards the balcony and rested my arms on the concrete and heaved a sigh. Why did it have to be here? I'm supposed to be having a good time.

"Hey..." I slightly flinched. I wasn't expecting him to come here. Paguusapan na naman kami nila Hana at Kiran!

"Hi, Kenji," i looked at him for a short moment and looked back at the view. What's he gonna say now?

"Kamusta?" oh.

"I'm well. How about you? It's been a while," I said without looking at him.

"I'm doing good, Eve..." He stood next to me and rested his arms on the concrete as well. "It's been three years," he looked at me.

I looked back at him. His face is illuminated by the moon and his eyes reflecting the brightness of the decorative lights. His nose casts a shadow on his face that highlights his eyes.

"I missed you," he walked closer.

"so much."

—
notes:
Evelyn's nicknames are - Eve (Ih-vee) & Ivy (Ay-vee)
Kenji's nicknames are - En (ehn) and K (ke-i)

new characters:
Hana Mosett (f)
Kiran Silvestre (f)
Ryan Chua (m)
Marco Garcia (m)