The Doctor and The Deathly Witch {DW/HP}

Time Crash

"He's a bit slow," the twins said, hearing their mother and grandpas snort. Ten looked up at them a little offended. "Okay. Sorry. Doctor," Ten said, stepping back, eyebrows raised.

"Thank you," Five said and turned around.

"Oh, the back of my head!" Ten cheerfully, making all of his children laugh. Ivy was trying to hide hers and James could be seen hiding his face in Lily's shoulder to not bring attention to himself while Remus and Tonks, like their son, looked like they were watching a tennis match.

"What?" Five asked, startled, trying to figure out what was wrong with the TARDIS.

"Sorry, sorry. It's not something you see every day, is it, the back of your own head. Mind you, I can see why you wear a hat. I don't want to seem vain, but could you keep that on?" Ten continues.

Five seemed to finally notice the difference in the TARDIS, "What have you done to my TARDIS? You've changed the desktop theme, haven't you? What's this one, coral?" Five accused.

"Well—," Ten tried to speak.

"It's worse than the leopard print," Five continued, not seeing Ten mouth, 'No' up to Ivy who had suddenly got excited. Ten turns back to see Five now wearing glasses, "Oh, and out they come, the brainy specs," Ten exclaimed, "You don't even need them. You just think they make you look a bit clever," Ten continued dancing around as if he was saying 'I know you better than you know you'. He saw synchronized eye rolls from Ivy and James, the two hated wearing glasses. James still wears his out of habit and because he died with them on, and Ivy wears them when she gets too overwhelmed by ghosts.

An alarm sounds, "That's an alert, level five, indicating a temporal collision. It's like two TARDISes have merged, but there's definitely only one present. It's like two time zones or more a the heart of the TARDIS. That's a paradox that could blow a hole in the space time continuum the size of...," Ten flipped a switch almost too quick for Five to see, "actually, the size the of Belgium. That's a bit undramatic, isn't it? Belgium?" Five rambles. Ten stayed calm, he could see that even though Ivy and the twins were highly amused, they were still uncomfortable with the oncoming paradox, which was why he was trying to keep them amused, he knew they would be fine, Ivy (or even Harold and Luna) hasn't said anything, and there were two of him there. Ten pulls out his sonic, "Need this?"

"No, I'm fine," Five said distractedly.

"Oh no, of course, you liked to go hands free, didn't you, like hey, I'm the Doctor. I can save the universe using a kettle and some string. And look at me, I'm wearing a vegetable," Ten taunts again.

"Who are you?" Five asks again.

"Take a look," Ten says.

Five looks around, "Oh. Oh, no."

"Oh yes."

"You're. Oh, no."

"Here it comes. Yeah, I am," ten says, hoping that Five figures it out.

"A fan," Five said, horrified. Ivy couldn't hold it any longer and started laughing hysterically, setting off her father in response while her mother's jaw just drops.

"Yeah. What?" Ten thought he had said the right answer, but then he didn't.

"This is bad. Two minutes to Belgium. Who are they?" Five asked motioning to those who were watching them. Five, in his distraction, didn't notice he unintentionally brought another passenger until he heard a mental scream. Padfoot had jumped up, shaking out his fur, "IT'S IN MY FUR, THAT LITTLE SHIT IS IN MY FUR!" both Doctors look up to see a rat fly off of Padfoot's fur and it landed near them, only to be stabbed and killed by a dagger, they both looked up to see Ivy holding an identical dagger, "I have a grudge," she said with a shrug. "HA! Serves it right!" the black haired man in the portrait said, startling Five.