Only a Matter of Time // Veronica Sawyer x Fem!Reader

twenty-one

"Don't wanna be that person, but it was a little obvious." I give her a surprised expression.

"Was it?" She pushes herself towards me on her swing, giving my arm a punch.

"Oh, don't say that." I laugh, rubbing my arm. I meet her eyes. "It was definitely obvious. I could tell just by the way you looked at me. Whenever we talked. And whenever we were alone."

"Could you tell when I kissed you?" I blurt out. She blinks a few times. Her eyes flit away. I look down. Why did I say that? We sit in silence for a moment longer.

"Yeah," she murmurs. My head snaps up as I look at her. "I could."

"Okay." I can feel my face burning up. I scratch my neck.

"I hope you could tell how much I liked you, too." I look at her. Her eyes are focused on the ground. When I don't reply, she sighs. "And here I am asking about stuff that happened four years ago."

"What-? No! Veronica, you have to stop doing that."

"... What?"

"Whenever I want to talk to you about it, you just change the subject and then I don't know when to tell you." She looks up at me.

"Then tell me." My mouth goes dry. She gives me an inquiring stare. I don't even know where to start. She looks away. I have the feeling I'm letting her down.

"Veronica, I just..." She glances at me. "I don't even know what to tell you. It's been years since I've actually faced my emotions. I haven't even told anyone about my time here."

"Why not?"

"Because I can't face it, alright?" We go quiet. "Hell, I was scared to come back here. I didn't think I was ready but I did it on an impulse and here I am. And now you're here. And now I don't know what to do with myself. I feel lost but I also feel like I've found what I needed to find here."

"What do you mean by that?" I meet her eyes.

"I think I still..." I look away. "I think I still have feelings for you, Veronica." She doesn't reply. "And I don't know what to do with them."

"Well..." I almost don't want to look at her. After what I just said, I don't know how to. "Well, that's a start, is it not? Telling me that." I slowly meet her gaze. She stands, facing away from me.

"I guess."

"Now you have to decide what you want from me," she says simply. She starts to walk away. I blink a few times, then scramble to my feet.

"Well, what the hell does that mean?" I demand. She gives me a shrug and nothing else, continuing to walk away. "Veronica!"

"It's your choice, y/n. I won't choose for you." I catch up to her.

"What am I supposed to-"

"I dunno. You tell me." She gives me a mischievous smile. "I'm not you." I clench my fists.

"Jesus." She laughs behind her hand.

"Am I frustrating you?"

"Very much so, yes." She smiles at me, biting her lip. Her eyes dart down to my side. I follow her gaze. She wants to hold my hand. I sigh, offering it to her. She takes it, fingers interlocking with mine.

"You know what I missed the most? Out of everything I could have missed here?" I tilt my head.

"What?" I ask. The corner of her lip turns up in amusement at my apparent confusion.

"You." Her grip on my hand tightens. "I missed you a lot. After you left I just... It felt like someone just took you away from me. And it hurt more because I didn't even get to say goodbye to you." I look down.