Wild Side || N.S.

★ sixxty two ★

          This could NOT be happening right now. 

Now?! Of all the times for this to be happening. When my life is literally falling apart around me and the love of my life is apparently dead or on the verge of being dead, I'm bringing a new life into this fucked up world I'm living in. Go fuckin' figure.

"Ria? Ria come on honey," Heather snapped her fingers in front of my face as she crouched down in front of me. "I called the ambulance, they'll be here fast. What do we need?" 

Dazed, I looked up at her and pointed towards the hall closet. Thankfully, we had a bag packed in the hall closet. We weren't expecting to use it for weeks but thank fuck we were prepared for one thing in our lives. Sorta.

"All right babe, let's get rolling then." Heather held her hand out for me to grab. After a little while, I reached up and took it as she slowly helped me up and guided me towards the front door. I slipped my black slides on and took a water bottle that Heather must have grabbed for me from our fridge and we made our way to the front porch. Heather made sure to lock the door behind us. 

"Whisky!" I suddenly shouted, startling both Heather and I.

"He'll be okay. I put down some pee pads and put up the dog fence so he can't leave the dining area. I'll come back to check on him but we have to take care of you first." Heather reassured me and once I was content with her answer, we made our way down the steps and the ambulance was there to greet us. 

"It's going to be all right ma'am, let's get you to the hospital." one of the medics guided me into the ambulance and before I knew it, we were off. 

I didn't know it then but another ambulance was picking up Nikki thanks to Tommy and was packed with two frantic medics doing their best to bring him back to life. I also didn't know that they were successful and the second Nikki was alive again, Tommy punched him right in the face. 

"What the fuck man?" Nikki groaned, then shortly puked into the bucket next to him. 

"What the fuck is right man! Heather called me at your old drug den and told me that because of you, Maria went into labour early thanks to your fucking voice mail!!" 

That seemed to set him straight. "Oh shit." 

Fast forward to the next morning; 9:50 AM...

          It all felt like a dream. One big surreal dream. As if the last thirteen hours of my life didn't even happen. And yet, here I was: exhausted, dripping with sweat, and feeling incredibly weak - but also incredibly strong. Because I was now a mother. 

I was holding my beautiful daughter in my arms and I felt on top of the world. My beautiful daughter: Audrey Olivia. 

She was the most amazing being I had ever laid my eyes on and I was completely in awe as well as in love. She was mine. I was hers. And I would love her forever and ever. 

We had had a few visitors. Tommy and Heather had stopped in after Heather went home and got some rest, seeing as she had been with me through the majority of my labour process. I am so grateful for her, I couldn't imagine having to have gone through that all alone. Tommy let me know that Nikki was checked into the same hospital and would like to come see us. I wasn't keen on the idea but after much deliberation, I agreed with Tommy to hear Nikki out and let him meet his daughter. 

As soon as my bandmates got word from Tommy, the boys came to visit Audrey and I, with various gifts for my daughter in tow. I couldn't help but laugh softly. I knew she was going to be spoiled right from the get-go. 

I got phone calls from Vince and Mick, sending their love and promising to come visit as soon as possible. I even got flowers and stuffed animals sent to my room courtesy of the boys of Guns N Roses. What a bunch of softies. I love 'em. 

Moments later, as Audrey was dozing off, I heard a soft knock at the door. I could already tell who it was by how timid the knock sounded. "Come in" I spoke, my voice a little scratchy, Audrey stirred at the sound. 

The door slowly opened to reveal a fresh faced, yet obviously tired Nikki standing in the doorway with a fluffy pink bear in his left hand. 

"I know I don't deserve it after what I put you through, but do you think I could get a look at the little peanut?" Nikki asked, his voice shaking as he spoke as if he was trying his hardest not to cry. 

I couldn't even speak, I just nodded. He padded over to us softly and pulled up a chair right next to the bed. He set the pink bear down on the night stand and took a seat, taking in the sight of our child. 

"I don't remember if we ever settled on a name..." Nikki trailed off, his eyes meeting mine. 

"No we didn't. But I named her Audrey. Audrey Olivia." I finally found my voice. 

"That's beautiful and very fitting. How'd you come up with it?" Nikki asked, looking down lovingly at Audrey.

"My... my mother's name was Audrey," I spoke. In all the time that Nikki and I have been together, I had never once addressed my parents. I always dodged the question or changed the subject the best I could. "My mother will never get to meet my daughter, but I want them to have some sort of connection."

Nikki stared at me, with tears rolling down his face. It took me a minute to realize I had tears rolling down mine as well. 

"I love that. And I love you." Nikki spoke boldly. 

"Nikki..." I warned.

"I know, I know. I'm really sorry for the things I said. And Tommy beat the shit out of me for you, don't worry. I was doing so well, at least I thought I was. Maybe I should check into a proper rehab facility. But I want to be there for you and for our daughter. I want to be in both of your lives, if you'll let me." 

"You'll have to give me time" I spoke after a while of processing what he had said.

"Of course. I get it. Just, please don't give up on me." he begged. 

"Don't give me any reason to." I countered. 

He nodded at my words. "Can I.... can I hold her?" Nikki asked.

I nodded, reaching slightly so Nikki could pick her up and swaddle her in his arms. He relaxed into the chair and held Audrey close. He kissed her forehead and she cooed in his arms. 

"You are my second chance," he whispered to our daughter. "and I'll do anything for you." 

. . .

A/N: Y'ALL I AM IN TEARS.

This took me a long time to write due to all the emotion it brought out of me and the fact that my boyfriend and I literally JUST moved into our own place and have been incredibly busy. So, thank you for your patience and I hope that this chapter was worth it. 

Let me know what you think? That would be greatly appreciated :) xo. ~