Always You

Chapter 4 | Proud

It turned out, I need much more will power for that cause the next time my eyes opened, it was already morning, the sun shining through the window jolting me awake.

I checked the other side of the bed which remained as it was indicating he never came back last night.

Where the hell is he?

Maybe he came back but slept in some other room. I got up to check but as he told me before, all the rooms were locked. I even checked the gym but he wasn't there.

Did I piss him off so badly that he didn't even come back to sleep?

I didn't even have his phone number so that I could call him and ask if he was okay...

I contemplated on calling his mother whose number I did have but I don't want to trouble her unnecessarily.

I paced around the living room, worried like hell.

But he might be okay. I should think positive. Maybe he worked overtime and stayed at the office only, he must have some rooms there for himself.

Or maybe he stayed over a friend's house...

Or maybe he met with a car accident and--

No, no. Think positive. Think positive.

He is okay. He is completely alright. I am worrying for no reason.

You know the worst part of being in an unrequited love is this urge to tell that person how much you love them, how much you care for them, how much they mean to you even though you know they won't reciprocate your feelings but still you just want them to know. To know that no matter what, at the end of the day there is someone waiting for them, waiting to know how their day was or if they had dinner or not. Or if they are okay, or just waiting to hear their voice.

You just want to pour your heart out.

Maybe one day I will tell him. One day.

Hope. I hoped a lot. And it was one of the best and the worst thing people can inflict upon themselves.

I made breakfast. For him too, yet again even though I know he won't he even look at it but what's wrong in trying.

I ate some of it and left the rest for him.

And I walked back upstairs to the bedroom. He doesn't even has the breakfast I make, he despises me so much.

How am I even going to ask him to send me to college. He will think that I only want his money when all I want is his heart and soul.

Maybe if I could get a part time job...
That seems like a nice idea.

I heard the front door opening and closing downstairs and I almost ran out of the room and halted on top of the stairs seeing Sorin enter.

He left yesterday wearing a suit, he came back today in grey sweatpants and a t shirt. His hair messy as if he just woke up.

Was he sleeping in the garden?

But then my eyes fell on his neck where there was a prominent and dark hickey, just where his shoulder and neck connected.

Oh.

Here I was worried something happened to him while he was just spending the night with his girlfriend. He looked happy and at peace.

It didn't even hurt cause I was just numb.

He started to walk towards the stairs while I just stood there frozen. As he climbed the first few steps, his eyes glanced upwards and stopped on me.

And within a second, his happy face was replaced, his features hardening, jaw clenching; a sour expression took over his face.

Looking away he just climbed up and went past me inside his room.

And that's when it hurt knowing how much I disgust him. That just the sight of me makes him angry, that I can never be the reason for anyone's smile.

I took a deep breath to control my emotions before they could flow out. And a minute or so later, I followed him inside the bedroom. He was in the bathroom, taking a shower and I sat down on the edge of the bed, fiddling with my fingers.

Two minutes later, the door opened and he stepped out with just a towel wrapped loosely around his waist. I was quick to lower my eyes but that didn't stop the delicious heat that spread throughout my body.

Keeping my head low, I stood up and said softly, "The breakfast is ready."

"I didn't ask you to make any." Came his cold, sharp reply.

Ouch.

"Yeah...but...I...I did...and it doesn't taste that bad..."

Suddenly, he took a step closer making my eyes widen slightly while I took a step back but my legs hit the bed, trapping me there.

He leaned closer and his cologne invaded my senses while I kept my eyes glued to the floor only.

"Stop your petty attempts at being my wife. You can't win me over and you are not my wife." His voice was low and threatening as he made sure to emphasize each and every word.

I just wanted him to have breakfast before he leaves for his office.

"I...I...no...I..." I stammered, lost for words.

He leaned even more closer and my breath hitched. "Understood?" He gritted his teeth.

I was about to say yes but then I decided to try my luck, and fight back a little.

"N-no." And I risked a glance at him and my heart thumped wildly realising how close we were. He raised his brow, surprised by my answer. "I...I am not trying to be your w-wife...I just...just trying to be a decent human being. I live with you and if I make food for myself then I will...make it for...for you too...w-wheather you...you like it or not."

Oh Damn. Fuck. What the hell! Did I just say that?! Shit.

No one spoke for a moment, I could only hear the sound of our breathing.

I waited for him to say something, to lash out at me, to curse me or anything but he didn't. He just remained silent and then a moment later, took a step back and another and before I knew it, he just turned around and went inside the closet. And I stood there frozen.

A few seconds later, my knees buckled and I fell down on the bed, sitting at the edge of it and took a deeo breaths to calm myself.

I can't believe I did that.

And somewhere inside me, I felt a teeny weeny bit of proud of myself.

Chapter completion on: 19/4/22
Published on: 10/5/22