Entry 1:
Dear ###,
Your one of the best friends I have ever had. When i need you, your always there for me. Even when I'm not there for you. Whenever you say i love you, even if it's just as a friend, you light a hope in my heart that makes me believe you will someday truly love me. I want to tell you so badly how much i think of you. I think of you in the shower. Before i fall asleep. While eating. Texting other people. Playing games. Sometimes i even dream about you. I really do want to tell you. God, im so selfish. She loves you, so much. You love her, even more. I can see it, even when your heartbroken and hurting her with your words. I feel so guilty for harboring these feelings for you, im so sorry. When you told me that you decided to be just friends, i thought i had a chance, i was so happy. Then when you texted me saying you missed hearing her voice, i knew it. I knew that i could never take you away from her. That i would never be better than her. I give up. I dont want to do this anymore. The only thing these feelings are doing for me is causing pain. Im so sorry.
Sincerely,
Me.
