A Court of Heart and Fealty | Rhysand

Chapter 2: A Rose is but a Rose

He held a hand up between them as though going to grasp something invisible. "Just..." He took a breath. "You will stay here until I figure out what to do with you."

The bitterness sat on her tongue. Figure out what to do with her. Her thumb stretched her middle finger down against her palm then ran across the metal of a thin silver band. It had a tiny gemstone of white on it. 

Azriel caught the movement. "No," he said quickly. His hand lifted to her shoulder on the opposing side and leaned closer. "No, that is not what I mean. You are certain Helion can protect you here until I tell you otherwise?"

Unable to speak more than a few words anymore, Galadriel nodded numbly.

"Good." As her eyes turned elsewhere, he squeezed her shoulder to regain them. "Stay quiet."

"I'll do better." His lips twitched but he said nothing more on the matter. Galadriel glanced towards her closed and locked door. "That was Cassian, wasn't it? The General Commander?"

"It was."

It was strange, at times, to know that her allegiance lies within a court that she has never been to before. Galadriel was neither born there nor lived there and the only members she has met are Azriel and a few Fae from the Court of Nightmares that left the den of their homes. But, she supposed, in a way that her allegiance was to Azriel only, not the Night Court. It was only by his loyalties that her information went to their use.

His eyes shifted to the wall behind him, letting her glimpse at a shadow curling around his ear. "He is looking for me. Remain here until I send new orders." The bargain tattoo tingled in response, alerting her that this was a firm order. One she could not disobey. "Be prepared to cut any ties you have here, even with Helion if need be."

Disappointment racked her, but she nodded again in acceptance of the consequences of her mistake. Azriel disappeared into a whirl of shadows, leaving her in her empty chamber. Sniffing, Galadriel wiped hard at her cheeks and turned to face the windows. She was fine, she kept telling herself. It was all fine. Azriel would sort it out.

But he is pissed that he has to, another part of her mind shot back.

He had been her only companion that knew of her true life. Helion and Amoise were close friends, but her loyalties to them were restricted. Now she may have to throw his offer of help back in his face and leave without notice. Would he think of her as only using him? For his position?

A sigh was the answer to her thoughts.

~

Galadriel spent the next few days chiding herself. She should have realised that her loyalties were being divided. She should have seen it coming and corrected her own behaviour rather than forcing Azriel to pick up the shards of what she had left to offer him. It rescinded her to a child—that sensation, she loathed. But handing that letter to Beron would have been a betrayal to the friends she had made. Galadriel did not think them as false friends; she put on no façade to gain their trust. There was a chance Azriel could ask her to remain here in the Day Court. It made the most sense as she was already here, trusted and a friend to the future High Lord. A perfect position to gather and infiltrate at a simple command. But it also meant forever moving behind Helion's back.

"Stop that." A hand slapped hers away. Galadriel's eyes widened as Helion frowned at the hand that had dropped back to her side. "It's a terrible habit."

She rubbed the marks of her teeth away from the side of her thumb. "You've made mention before," she drawled. "And if we are chiding on bad habits, I should be taking away your drinks."

Amber eyes thinned in her direction. "Do that and you'll lose a hand."

Galadriel only smiled back. "And then you'll heal it for me because you'll feel guilty that you hurt me."

A long sigh followed as the Son of Day wrinkled his nose. "I'm not so sure of that. But feel free to test such an idea. Have you thought any more of my offer?"

Her throat bobbed as she managed a calm nod. "I have. I wrote to my family just this week and I'm awaiting response. They like to travel between courts, you see, so it may take time to reach them. I will let you know as soon as I have word." Helion accepted her answer as they pandered down a lane just past the palace gardens. It led to the outskirts of the city, nearing a barracks the palace guard remained within. The sweet scent of summer lingered in her nose, the warm air encasing yet fresh. "How are you and Amoise?"

"The letter you destroyed was informing her that we should cease writing." The flat, resigned tone of her friend was so unnatural that it sent her swivelling on her heels to face him, deep lines etched into her forehead. Though their relationship had never been sealed, nor had they seen each other in a decade, both leading with their individual lives, even then they wrote letters of affection, signed by names not of their own. Helion tightened his lips and halted his strides. "It is not worth what may come of it."

"Do you not love her?" Galadriel prompted.

He took a moment to answer, seeming to soak in the daylight as though it refreshed him with life. "I do. But love is not everything. I love the flowers of the garden, but I cannot force them to bloom through winter."

"Is that you trying to be wise?" But she listened to what he had to say. Galadriel had seen the power of love. She had seen it in the face of Amoise's youngest son, who was only nineteen years younger than herself. Lucien was prepared to give up everything for that fae woman, yet Helion was prepared to give up love for the sake of politics. Galadriel wasn't sure who she considered stronger.

She had not told Helion of what Amoise suffered in consequence of Beron's suspicions, at Amoise's command. Perhaps ceasing the letters altogether would leave no more trace for Beron to chase. To prove his wife's infidelity. Maybe Helion was doing this for her sake rather than his own.

Helion made a single noise of mirth. "Metaphorical," he corrected. His arm shot out towards the city. "Besides, there is plenty of fun and company to be had that will not end in pain. Why would I waste my time hiding from that?"

Her mouth remained shut in answer. If that was his way to deal with being unable to see Amoise, then she would let him be. He had a duty to his court and ruining it through affairs to a married woman of another would tarnish much more than an already fragile alliance. If alliance was even the right word for the tensions between the Autumn and Day Court. Galadriel understood the meaning of duty, she understood well what it meant to give up. Like Helion, she was reminding herself of what truly mattered, where her loyalties should remain unwavering. There can be no room for love to a married female, and no actions to contend her fidelity to Azriel.