Hanggang sa Huli.

4

TW: Mentioning of illn3ss and d3@th
There might be some Filipino words here so I added some translations- thank you!

"Alicia.. She is experiencing so much pain right now. She has a brain tumor and her heart is not in great condition as well.. I'm sorry that I had to say this.. She's been visiting this hospital for about 2 months.. But she only has 2 days to live.. but I don't think she can make it overnight anymore something was worrying her so much that the brain tumor.. she was having such a hard time."

I was too shocked to even talk..

"Let me leave you for a while now.. she'll wake up in a few minutes.. well I hope so" said the doctor.

"Ali.. why didn't you say anything.. I want to cry so bad but I can't."

"You can cry, you have me here." Alicia said.

"Hey.. You're awake.." I said.

"You know now. Don't you?" She said which made me weaken.

"Yes.. WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ANYTHING, ALI?!"

"A-ali? That's what you call me.... when we were still best friends.. And I'm sorry. I know you don't care about me anymore.. so I didn't want to worry you.. That's why I didn't say anything about this. I'm sorry."

"Ali if you can't fight back anymore.. you can stop :) We'll be okay. I'll try to be okay.. You can rest now, my love."

"Hon.... I hope to see you.. in our next life where.. we can love each other... longer and to be able to freely express our feelings. I hope for you to be happy, even without me. Thank you for the plenty years of love as my bestfriend and 2 months of love as my husband. Thank you for everything. Making me happy and all the love. I hope you once again find you happiness, even if it's not me. You know that I don't keep grudges, right? It's okay to forget me. At least promise me that you will try to be happy, hmm? If ako parin man after 10 years... it's okay even if it's not me you love anymore. If you go to my grave, try to be happy hmm? Try to tell me stories. You can do whatever you want. You can let out your stress, absolutely anything that can make you happy. I just want you to be happy, hon. Always be happy. Hanggang sa huli, ikaw parin. Mahal na mahal kita. (Up until the very end, it's still you. I love you so much.) I have to close my eyes now.. they're getting heavy... but this "nap" would last forever. One last goodbye :) "

- closes eyes -
-

-

"Love... */sniffles
I love you too. I'll do my best to fulfill that promise. I'll be happy, I'll try to be happy. Why did you have to go, right now? I was ready to tell my feelings for you. The saying "Nasa huli lagi ang pagsisisi." ("Repentance is always in the end.") I should've told you everything. Form the very start. I should have loved you as much as you loved me.. no.. I can never match the love you give.. I should've at least given 50% of you're love. You are such a caring human being. I don't think I deserve you. Why am I saying all this now? I didn't have the courage to say this to your face.. I'm sorry, hon. For everything I've caused you all the sadness, crying, making you think I don't love you. I have to let you go.. but my feelings and my heart... I don't think they can let go. Now I'm saying "should've" I.. this hurts so much.. I- I don't think I can move on that easily... Sorry.. I am very.. sorry, hon. You loved me honestly and I feel like I just played with you. I can't seem to forgive myself. Handa akong maghintay pero my one and only great love... has left me. I have no one anymore. I'm sorry."

- Time skip -

"It's been 5 months.. why do I feel so empty inside? I miss you, hon. I don't have the sweet woman who would greet me every time. My parents aren't here anymore as well. Sorry.. I'm saying too much things. I just want to put my feelings in place. I really miss you, hon. I hope you're doing well. Wherever you are right now."