CARMEN THINKING - THE SOUND INSIDE A SEASHELL PART 1

she has good moments

in fact when I called her to say thank you, she was genuinely surprised

real love

real friendship

is not spiteful or self-seeking

never was never will be

I rested in peace last night

because I know that I really tried

I truly did my best and truly tried to be the bigger person on every single occasion

I rested in peace last night

because I know that I had just had enough

something's can be understood just by looking at it but other things...

even when you're in the thick of things, you couldn't explain it

not even to yourself

and sometimes I think that's the problem...

people don't understand

sometimes I think

they simply don't want to

the only difference now

is me

I used to want

hell, I used feel a need to be understood

now,

if you get it

"cool"

if you don't get it

"tough"

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PRICELESS AND FREE

July 15, 2014

just because something/someone is not a big deal to you

just because you can live without them

doesn't mean it doesn't hurt the person you say you love deeply, when you dismiss that very thing or person that they care for...

the feelings of the people we love is deeply entangled with the feelings of the people they love, regardless of our opinion of them

you can't disregard someone's feelings

because they are an inconvenience to you

or because it involves someone you hate

if you do

then you do NOT

really love

them

and

you really never have...

A GIRL WITH HEADPHONES ON...

July 17, 2014

you see a girl with headphones on

you see a girl here

but she is so far gone

trapped for far too long

her whole life just an echo of what everybody else wants

but her music, this music

lets her go places,

places where she can shine

places where she can smile

places where she can be as selfish as they all claim her to be

you see a girl with headphones on

but I am so so far gone...

R.I.P LIL TEAGRIN MORRIS

July 23, 2014

every time I see that little boy's photo

every time they mention him on the news

I feel like another piece of my heart breaks off

and I am surprised

I am surprised that something can still shock me in this world

but this brutality shocks me to my core,

my

mind

just

cannot

understand

why

I

just

don't

get

it

I try not think of what happened because my imagination leaves me reeling...

I hurt inside

I hurt in places inside my heart that I didn't know I had

I feel my soul open up

every time I hear his name

Teagrin

my soul lets out a wail

a wail that only a mother can hear

my soul cries out

it cries out

to his mother

to every mother

who has ever lost a child

to every mother really

because

just

the

thought...

just the thought

is

so

horrific

a nation

a community

a people

collectively holding our breath

collectively hoping against hope that this will be a bad dream

sleep now little angel

rest now

we will not forget you

we cry for you

we think of you

we honor you

THE GIRL WHO CRIES THE WHOLE WORLDS TEARS

July 23, 2014

Do not condemn the little heart

that

feels

too

deeply

it is,

in fact

that

little

heart

that confirms

that we are still

human...