We Fall Like Ashes | Wildfire Series

Twenty-Seven: Tell Me You Like Me

It would be so easy to lose myself in thoughts of Collins, of what I would have done if she hadn't stopped me, which was to have her watch as I made her come, made her scream. I would have thrust my fingers inside that slick pussy and asked if she really fucking thought my fine motor skills were just fine.

But using those thoughts to get off...my stomach soured at the idea. I'd rather let myself suffer. My dick could fall off for all I cared. Then maybe I'd be able to think with some common sense for once.

I'd entered a new, unthinkable circle of hell. And at this point, I didn't think I'd be able to crawl back out. I was in too deep.

After wrapping a towel tightly around my waist, I slicked back my wet hair so it wouldn't be hanging in my face and strode into the hallway. And because someone in the underworld or high up in the sky hated me, Collins was there—a foot away from walking back into her bedroom. Her curly hair sat in a pile on top of her head, and she hadn't put her pants back on yet. Her white t-shirt barely covered her hips.

Come on, big guy upstairs. Why you gotta keep doing shit like this to me?

When she saw me, she froze.

How on earth were we going to survive living together? I couldn't do this. Not when she looked at me like that, all wide-eyed and aroused. Her gaze scraped over me like it was actually her fingertips, clawing at my chest, at my heart. All the way down until eventually, her eyes fell on my erection. Which was still there. Still massive. Still wanting her.

When her eyes made it back up to my face, and I saw the yearning there, I lost it.

"You know what I hate?" I snapped, closing the distance between us in quick strides, not even caring that I was leaving a trail of water in the hallway.

Collins took a step back, running into the wall. I noticed that the streaks of clay were gone, and her hands were cleaned. And it fucking annoyed me that I hadn't been the one to take care of that for her.

"What?" she breathed.

"I'm not an angry dude, Collins," I said, even though the tone of my voice said otherwise. I walked right up to her until we were close enough that I could see the rawness in her eyes. "I learned that if it's something that I can't change, I need to let it go. And if it was something that could be changed, I need to do something about it. I'm not naïve enough to think the world is always a happy place, but I've found a happy place in the world, and I made the decision a long time ago to do what I can to stay there."

Collins' throat worked as she swallowed.

"I hate feeling angry," I said, lowering my voice to a dangerous pitch. "But I'm downright pissed right now. And you wanna know why that is?"

I saw the slight hitch, the little intake of breath she did. "Why?"

My wet hair fell in front of my eyes, and I pushed it back out of my face. "Because I can't stop trying to do something about our relationship even though I can't seem to change it. I can't change it." I closed my eyes briefly. "You make all my rules go out the goddamn window."

Sure, we'd grown closer. But she still wasn't letting me in. She still refused to involve me in her life the way I wanted to be.

Slapping my hand against the wall behind her, I leaned in. Collins arched up, keeping her gaze on me even as I pressed in closer.

"I'll give up trying if you really want me to, but then you can't—" I cut off with a ragged breath as desire and irritation built up a growl in my throat. I rested my other hand on the wall to the side of Collins' shocked face and then continued through gritted teeth. "But then you can't fucking do that."