Writer in the Dark - J. HALE

38 - ꜰʟᴏᴡᴇʀꜱ

"What were you thinking about?" he asked about twenty minutes into the walk, deciding that now would be a good time since she had calmed down her emotions just a little bit. He thought they might be easier for her to handle and figure out now.

She sighed, struggling to figure out one thing that had been a part of her thoughts. "My existence, nothing too deep and Billy," she chuckled softly, eradicating the nervousness that flooded through her mind.

"Was it anything you wanted to talk about or?"

"I've just had multiple signs for the past few months that he's not going to be around for as long as I will. I mean he's going to get sick, worse than he was before and they're nothing I can do to stop it," she ranted then stopped talking. She stopped walking too, instead looking up at a gap between the trees to try and make sense of what she was feeling. She liked that he hadn't tried to soothe anything away yet, instead letting her figure it out for herself. Most of the time it was a nice thing to happen but this was something she wanted to feel in all respects. "I just feel so hopeless you know? Like he was someone I depended on more than anything for so long when I first turned and everything happened. And the worse part is I can't even cry to get away some of the feelings like mortals do," she sighed, feeling the crunching of the rocks beneath her foot as she dragged it across the surface, feeling somewhat less overwhelmed by the action. 

Jasper didn't even wait for her to look up before he wrapped his arms around her torso, pulling her gently into a hug that relaxed every tense bone in her body. She didn't realise how much she had missed proper hugs like this one. Her hands, which had previously been gently pressed against his chest in tiny fists, wrapped their away over his shoulders and looped behind his neck. She took a few deep breaths with her face resting in the nape of his neck, feeling her mind still almost completely. She loved that hugs had that effect on her, they always had.

He spoke softly as they hugged, "I promise you, whatever happens now, I'll be here if you need someone to talk to or just to sit in silence in a room with. I won't ever leave you again Athena.  And I know that's nothing compared to what you have with Billy and quite frankly it probably won't seem like much help to you-"

"It's all the help in the world Jazz," she replied, bringing her head back up with a soft smile showing on her lips.  "Talking to you does help you know. Like a lot."

He slowly grew a smirk, hug still engaged as she hadn't pulled away just yet, "Glad to be of service ma'am." She chuckled softly and pulled her gaze from his, finding her eyes settling on something she had been blind to before. She gasped softly, untangled herself from his arms then ran through the small part of the forest that originally blocked her vision. A slightly confused Jasper turned and followed finding himself smiling at the sight in front of him.

"I love spring!"  she laughed as she ran through the field of white flower buds that shook and fell in the soft breeze, sending flying petals all around her. She had slipped off her shoes, loving the feeling of the soft grass brushing against her feet as she ran and twired through the field, feeling the sun soak into her glittering skin. "Lucifer, this is gorgeous!"

He had never seen something that resembled her more. The light dancing on her skin, the petals in her hair and one of the brightest smiles he had ever seen easily bought to her face. Maybe he began to understand why she loved this sort of nature so much, just not the trees. "Having fun there?" he laughed, watching her twirl around in complete joy whilst he leant against a tree.

She stopped fully, eyes trained on him. Then, without even thinking about it, she ran forward and grabbed his hand - pulling a now chuckling Jasper into the field of flowers. He loosened up a little after he used their clasped together hands to twirl her around, resulting in laughter that brought a smile to his face. Those minutes in the field were some weird time-warp where everything felt like it would last forever and ever.

"Hey, random question," she spoke softly, breaking the silence and comfort created by the moment.

"Shoot," he replied with a soft smirk that would have bought blush to her cheeks.

"What happened to your old phone?" she asked calmly, despite the panic that filled her lungs. She just hoped that he no longer had access to it, that would be embarrassing.

"I smashed it, like all the others did," he replied quickly, pausing as he noticed the feeling of relief sweep over her. "Took a while to fully cancel it though. Why?"

"Oh no reason," she replied with a reassuring smile, hoping to change the subject. By just looking into his eyes she could tell that he knew, he knew that messages upon messages had been sent to that number. He had done the same thing with unsent letters so it really wasn't a thing to focus on, unless he wanted to out his secret too. So the two of them ignored the conversation, choosing to focus on something that hadn't happened during that time. Like the flowers that surrounded them.