"Aren't you supposed to be the one who guards me and not the other way around?"
"You never get into any trouble, what will I even guard you from."
"Hmm, you have a point."
⚠️W A R N I N G⚠️
This story includes abusive language, bullying, violence, a...
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It's been a month since I lost her, I never really left my room. There was no reason for me to leave. It was me, again, all alone. I chuckled dryly and went in the kitchen.
"Mornin' mum." I tried to sound as cheerful as possible. The smell of fresh flour and raspberries was filled in the kitchen, that smells delicious. She loved raspberries.
I smiled to myself remembering the now bittersweet memories. Almost everything makes all the memories about her come back, which is why I didn't want to step out of my room.
We created a lot of moments, loads of memories to keep with ourselves, to keep us happy but who knew that those beautiful memories will lead to sorrowful joy. I can't hold onto her, I know that. I should move on so she finds peace, I am happy that she got released from the everyday misery she had to suffer but still there is a tiny part of me who wants her back, who wants to hug her one last time. I don't want her to live her after life in regret.
I pull myself together and sat on the chair as my mom serves me my favourite raspberry pancakes.
"Buckle up hun, today is the first day of your senior year, you can do this." She ruffled my hair and went back in the kitchen to do some chores.
Yes, it is my last year of high school. I can make through it. I promised myself and her that I will live my life to the fullest, I will try to accomplish all my goals.
'I'll live one life for the two of us'
I smiled remembering how much she loved this song. I ate my breakfast with a small smile plastered.
"Bye mum, I am leaving for school now."
"Bye honey, and remember-"
"No crying, I know mum. I won't." I pecked her cheek and left for school.
Now it's a fun place to visit but not for me. I have been bullied since my first year here. I never really got it, why did everyone always bully me. I tried standing up once but I chickened out and got punched. Things like this just remind me of her.
Ok, no more talks about her! And I will try to stand up for myself. Yes! That's the spirit!
I entered the school gate clutching on to my bag straps. All the attention was on me and all the gossip started. I thought they would have forgotten about what happened. I already hate this.
I kept my head down and walked to my locker. I took the required stuff and went to my first class. Literature.
I took a seat near the window and sat down. I opened her diary that she had kept in her drawer. I know this is invasion of privacy, but that diary gives me a little hope. Reading how she dealt with her pain everyday gives me courage to live, and at least try to become as strong as her. Everyone started entering the class, no one sat beside me, I am okay with it, this seat is taken. I chuckled as I remembered a scene from one of the shows we watched.
