flirting with fire ⋟ bucky barnes ▪︎ oc

thirteen.

He hadn't heard it lock yet, so he used that as an excuse to walk right into her private space, his need to control every aspect of his life guiding his decisions. He finds her small frame curled on the couch, her once comfortable and cozy apartment left in shambles, now cold, messy, broken, and dreary.

"What happened, Poppy?" He breathed out as he studied the war scene before him. There was empties, ripped photos, broken frames. When he spotted the photo of her mom infront of her on the table without a frame with two joints rolled up on top, he got an idea of what it was about. She hadn't looked over at him yet, he slowly closed the door and walked to place the soup on the counter, and the dahlias in a small cup of water.

Without a word, he walked towards her and scooped her into his arms. He could see the dried tears on her skin, the pain in the way her face frowned.
"I want to be alone James." She whispered while her body was too tired to fight. He shook his head, "I don't want you to be alone."

"You don't have to tell me, but I want you to know I'm here, for anything, always." He spoke in a low tone that made her heart ache for him.

She only gazed up at him from where she sat in his arms, she wanted to share with him, let him in. She didn't know why but the need to share honestly with him burned inside her.

"I found her," she whispered. He looked down at the pained little thing in his arms as she stared at the photo, "your mother?"

She nodded, "she was nearly blue... swollen. A decade and the image still lives in my head," she grabbed a wad of her messy spirals anxiously while he carried her toward the bathroom.

He sat her down on the bathroom bench, his thumb rubbing down he soft freckle sprinkled cheek, "I'm so sorry baby, no one should ever have to see that."

He sat on his knees and started to fill the bathtub for her. She watched as his jeans hugged his legs in the kneeling position. As he filled the tub with a few salts and soaps, she stared intrigued, no one had ever truly taken care of her before. The idea of him desiring to do so sent her mind on a manic emotional coaster, she was in no mental capacity for that.

He turned as the tub filled, standing and starting to undress her. "So is that why you needed the day?" He whispered nervously as he helped her step from her sweats that lay in a pool on the tiled floor.

She nodded slowly, "every year is different...but this year, Nat isn't here and I didnt want to bother her. I was up all night," she felt the tears gathering in her eyes and she swallowed, attempting to hide them with a quick sweep of her tiny hand.

"I hate how deeply I feel everything," she mumbled quietly. He heard her and swallowed, unable to find words to respond as he looked back at her.

She looked from his icy pools of blue to the water filling the tub. He was studying her eyes before he put a hand out to helped her. She stepped into the tub, following his lead as he helped her lay down.

She relaxed into the water, the alcohol she'd been drinking over the past 48 hours suddenly making her realize how tired she is. Emerald eyes flutter shut as he studies her, the peaceful serenity in the water relaxing her muscles as her anxieties flow away.

He felt himself wanting to let her in, as she did him, helping her feel more comfortable sharing. "I watched my Mom pass away as a teenager, she died slowly. So when she did finally let go...she barely looked like herself anymore, she was all the family I had left..or it felt that way atleast."

She could hear the sadness in the words he spoke so quietly. She grabbed his hand that wrapped over the side of the tub, "I'm so sorry James. That must have been quite difficult." He nodded, "it was, but I did have Steve, as well as his family."

She hummed in response, she was completely alone back then in Essex. She hated the jealous tingle she felt, because she had no one back then, some days she still feels like that. But since meeting these guys, it feels possible to feel whole.

As she lay back into the warm water, letting the temperature calm her down, his eyes remained gazing into hers. "I'm sorry for calling off, I shouldn't have. I just-" he ran his hand softly over her cheek as she rest her head on the porcelain edge.
"You don't have to explain yourself, not at all."

He grabbed the loofah that lay near the faucet, squirting floral wash on it and lathering it onto his hand as she watched. Her eyes filled with curiosity at the softness of his actions, the tattood giant kneeling beside her with flower wash and a pink loofah.

His inked hand disappeared under the water before pulling her leg from where it was submerged, washing it as he held it to rest along the edge. He washed her skin gently as she watched intently. He felt her stare and glanced over with a small grin tugging at his lips, noticing the way her brows pressed together and studied him.

He let out a breath as he used the soap left on his palm to carress her shoulder with a small massage, "you aren't used to people taking care of you, are you baby?" He asked in a silvery tone that sent familiar shivers down her spine as she shook her head slowly, she just shook her head.

He nodded as he finished cleaning her and rinsing her soft pale skin with a clean cloth by the sink, "come on then, I can tell you're tired. Let's get you to sleep."

He held a hand out for her, she grabbed it, making her way to standing before him. She stood dripping wet and bare with sadness still etched on her face. He wrapped a thick black towel around her before scooping her into his arms in a protective maneuver.

She was speechless when he placed her on the bed and hurried around her room to help her get dressed.

After a few moments she whispers, "James, I can dress myself."
He shook his head and slid a black Beatles tshirt over her messy curl filled bun.

"Just let me take care of you, okay?" She bit her lip and nodded with doe eyes staring at him.

After she was dressed he laid her back in bed, tucking her into her white duvet. "Get some sleep today, I have to run back for a meeting, but I'll call you later. If you need me, please text."

She nodded, her eyes fluttering slowly as he watched her breathing steady quickly. His poor baby doll was exhausted.

He looked at his watch as he walked back out into the crime scene of a living room. Letting out a large breath he hurried to clean up the space for her, filling a trash bag full of empties and glass. He lost himself in tidying up her space for her, almost two hours later he left filled with anxiety and quickly made his way to work.

She warned him, she really did...
and that's just the beginning, James.

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