All I ever wanted

28.

He's my bestfriend.
And probably he will be nothing more than that.
I feel like it.
Why he would love me back? There's no reason for that.

"Can you say it?" He asked. It made me feel dizzy.
I closed my eyes for a second. I needed a moment to put myself together.
"How romantic to say it in a hotel bathroom, in less clothes and being hangover..." I chuckled quietly.
"What does it matter?" He responded. I lifted my head up again, and looked him through the mirror. That felt more safe than look at him by face to face.

Someone knocked the door loudly.
"Eevi! Are you there?" We heard Santeri's voice.
That made me relieved. Another reason for me to avoid the conversation with Olli.
I truly am weak.
I sighed and took some jeans from the floor and put them on fast. I headed to the door and opened it.
"Morning sunshine, take your stuff and come to breakfast. We have to leave soon." He greeted me, having sunglasses on.
I think we all are in hangover.
"I'll be fast." I smiled to him. He didn't ask anything about Olli, so did Joel tell them that he saw us leaving the bar together? Probably.

We walked to the table where everyone was already eating, or trying to eat. Mostly they drank some juices. I saw how Joel's eyes were on me and Olli.
"I'll bring you something to drink." Olli said to me and put his hand to my waist for a second.
I only nodded to him and then sat next to Niko.
"You guys left from the bar and didn't say anything? We were worried that where did you go." Niko said and looked at me behind his sunglasses.
"We? Come on, you were the only one who cried after Eevi all night." Joonas chuckled next to Joel.
I looked at Niko, and he looked kinda embarrassed.
I smirked.
"Did my brother miss me? That's so sweet." I put my hand on his cheek and gave it a little squeeze. He only tried to push his head away and everyone quietly giggled around us.
"I was drunk, let's not forget that." He pointed his finger up. Olli came with two juices, and he sat across from me. I only smiled to him lightly and took a small sip of the apple juice.

"And you guys were together all night? Tommi said he slept alone in his room." Joonas teased us smirking. We looked each other with Olli for a second.
"Yeah, we run away from Emilia and then went to sleep in Eevi's room." Olli responded.
Well that's the truth. Nothing happened.
But we kissed. Can't forget that, it was the best kiss I've ever had.

"Where she went by the way?" I decided to change the subject. Everyone looked each other, like trying to find the answer.
"Uhm.. she just left. Haven't seen her after you left the bar." Joel said. I looked him, maybe a bit pissed. Why he invited her anyway?

"I know where she is." Aleksi suddenly said.
We all looked into him, and stopped everything what we were doing.
Aleksi looked us all, and then pointed with his head to the hotel reception which was a bit further away.
I turned around, and so did Niko next to me and Tommi next to him.
Everyone's eyes were there. She just stood there, and I'm sure she saw us. Probably waiting for us to leave and then she would bother us again.

As we were done with eating, we started to leave to the van. All of our stuff were there already. We tried to leave the hotel fast as possible, before fans find their way here or before Emilia starts to talk shit again.

"Hey! Guys!" She shouted after us. My nerves were so thin right now.
"I need to say couple words to her." I said to the boys, they looked shocked.
"No. Let's leave now." Olli took grip of my wrist when they all were on the van already. I just stood on the doorway. Gently I pushed Olli's arm away.
I turned around and walked to her, she looked pissed then.
"Your face changes immediately when you see that you can't talk to the boys." I said amused to her. She rolled her eyes.
"I want to talk to-" She started, but I interrupted her.

"Fucking leave Olli alone. And all of us." I kept tense look on her.
"I will." She only responded, looking at me with pokerface. Not any emotion in her voice.
I nodded lightly, maybe a bit confused. I turned around and started to walk back to the van.
"I'm sorry." Suddenly she said. It made me stop, and frowning I turned around. I took couple steps back to her, and she looked so.. normal? She didn't have that annoying look on her face. She didn't look at me up and down, contemptuously.

"I think it's too late for that." I only said. I felt cold person right now, but how could I be nice to her, after everything she has done to me and Olli?

"Maybe I sound harsh right now, but I'm being honest. I hope I never see you again. And if I see, I wish you don't try anything. After all your lies and what you have done to Olli.. that's just terrible. You don't treat people like that." I continued. She crossed her arms against her chest, and looked her feet.

"Well.. you're right. I'm a terrible person. Love makes people crazy.. you know that right?" She chuckled in the end, quietly. She tried so hard to be worth of forgiving.
"Your actions are not made by love, that's something else. And yes, I know what it feels like to be in love, as well as you know." I looked to the van fast, and Santeri was giving me the signal to come. Yes, we had to go. But I needed to say the last words for this crazy person.

"I wish you can find help to your problems. But now, bye to you.. hopefully forever." I looked her up and down fast and then turned around. I started to walk again.
"Aren't your words a little harsh?" she shouted after me as I reached the van.
"Think twice what you have said to everyone. My words are not that bad if we compare them to yours." I said back and then hopped in to the van. And finally the journey back to Helsinki would start.

"So, our tour is over now. The next plan is to continue making the album. Long days ahead." Niko said smiling while sipping his soda.
"What about Tommi and Olli? Is Oulu calling?" Aleksi asked next. I immediately looked Olli.
That's the guestion. Where does he go now?
"It is calling for me, what about our yoga master?" Tommi said from the driver's place.

Then Olli landed his eyes on me. I saw it in his eyes, he didn't know. He looked lost. Like he tried to find the answer by looking at me.
I think we both are lost.
Lost in our thoughts.

Will Emilia be a trouble anymore? What do you guys think?
I'm very thankful to you for reading this story, and leaving votes and comments <3
Next chapter might come at monday, not sure, but I'll try my best.
If you're feeling empty, lost, or sad right now, believe me, better days are coming.
Take care of yourself, stay safe and strong🖤