You're more than I could ever be.
I'll never be good enough for you. How could you ever love someone as lowly as me? Your eyes sparkle in the sunlight like the finest riches in this damned world, mine lay dull and plain. Your hair falls perfectly around your shoulders and captivating face, mine is unkept and messy. You deserve better than I'll ever be, I don't deserve your love at all. Something so beautiful and lively isn't something my worthless soul should hold dearly. I'm sure there's someone else out there who can love you better than I ever could. I pushed you away, it hurt the both of us. I saw the wells in your eyes that glistened. The wind blew and your hair got caught in your tear stained face. I'm so insecure. I'm sorry. I loved you but I couldn't have something so perfect. I wonder if you still care about me. I seem lost in a dust storm without you. Here I am! Back to wallowing in my own shame and regret. You were my light, my happiness. I wasn't your light in the dark. I'm depressing and shameful. You deserve someone who could give you the world, show you the heavens and back. Not someone who would hurt you time and time again. I just couldn't take seeing how I affected you. How your friends looked at us and whispered things I couldn't possibly imagine. How people gossiped around us about what you were doing with a complete loser such as I. I just believed that letting you go would be the best thing to do for us. Maybe I regret it but in some way I feel like I always will. I just want you to know that I'm sorry, I love you.
I walked away from the grave, the pouring and freezing rain pounded on my back. My heart felt things I never thought it would. I didn't think that you'd... do that. I just wish I knew then.
