Always Yours: All Over Again

Chapter 30: All Over Again

Kim's POV 

- A Few Days Later - 

It's was still there. That feeling. It was like something was following me around everywhere I went; like it was hunting me down. I talked to Kendall about it. No - actually hr figured something was up so I confessed. Even though it seemed to take a lot of weight of my chest, the ominous eerie chills were still there. I felt so scared now.

But other than that, Kendall and I had gotten really really close to each other since, ahem, that night and our relationship has been stronger than ever. Plus, Make Me Wanna Miss you is set to release in three weeks. The only thing that kept us from releasing it earlier, is that every time we sung, we looked at each other, and I either smirked through the whole thing without knowing it, or he kept poking my side that tickles so I'd burst out laughing, and we've only had like three recording session, including the one that wasn't a recording session...and so far we hadn't made a lot of progress.

But we'd get over it. Or not.

Kendall and I sat on the couch at my place. I was in his lap, leaving teasing kisses on his neck and jaw-line as he watched some celebrity gossip channel. It was like that for a good long while, until something caught my attention. 

"Exclusive interview with Kim Hadley!"  What?

"What interview babe?" Ken asked. I shook my head in confusion.
"I haven't given any interviews." I told him. He frowned slightly as we turned back to the screen.

The scene from a couple of days ago popped on. My face appeared, along with those black clothed people. Paparazzi.

"Do you love Michael Clifford?" 
"Of course I do!" The me on the screen said. Everything paused as a 'SHE DOES' in bright pink letters flashed across my face. My eyes popped out of my sockets and I felt Kendall stiffen underneath me. But there was more. 
"What are you feelings for Kendall?" Another pause, then the words I had never said in my whole entire life came out of my mouth. "He cheated on me!

If I wasn’t shocked, now I definitely was. “WHAT?!” Kendall shouted as we both scrambled to stand up in total surprise. And then a man walked on to the frozen screen.

‘Whoa! Did that just happen?!’ He seemed to be working hard to hide a smirk. ’Well if Kim says she loves ol’ Mikey, we believe her.’ Then he looked around as if looking for reassuring sources. ‘And Kendall Schmidt cheated on her?!’ He shook his head in mock sorrow. I was glaring at the screen, anger rising up inside me. It felt like the man was talking directly to me. All his snide remarks were pointed in my direction. I could break through the screen right now, and strangle him with the whole world watching.

Then he winked, pointing at the camera and as old pictures of me and Michael hanging out began to flash on the screen. In the park, eating some ice cream, posting weird pictures of Insta Gram and a whole lot of others. All they did, was make my blood boil with hate. The man reappeared, smirking again, and told all the viewers to keep watching more updates on us, keep watching MTV, and the screen went black, as Kendall, his hand enclosed around the remote control, bawled into a fist as he turned it off.

I immediately turned to him; his face was stony white.
“You love Michael?” He whispered, in a barely audible voice.
“Kendall I- ” But before I could finish, he looked at me, hurt filling his eyes, and without a word, he turned around, walked right out of the house. My heart dropped like a boulder sinking into sea, when I saw the look on his face. Guilt was building up inside me as I ran after him.

“Kendall! Wait, no, stop!” I shouted. His descending figure stopped at the gates, and turned around. I approached him, carefully. I knew he was angry. So angry, he was like a bomb that was about to go off.

“Kendall, please. Just listen – that’s never happened I-”

“I TRUSTED YOU!” He suddenly burst out. His voice shook as he did. I could hear the pain, because I felt it too. My eyes burned and tears began to form. “Kendall – ”

“I loved you! I never stopped loving you! You were the only person that mattered to me. After eight years- eight years. I saw you again. I thought my life was perfect. I thought you felt the same. But I was wrong.” He said, tears glistening on his face. It was like someone had stabbed my heart with a hundred knives. I tried to explain.

“Kendall, I swear that didn’t happen. That interview has been tampered with!” I cried. “I love you, not Michael. That never happened! Please, believe me.” I said, weakly, tears cascading down my face.

“No.” He said, and hearing that, my knees gave away and I sunk to the ground. My world was spinning in fast moving circles. No…

“You were my everything. I loved you, I cared about you. You meant everything to me, Kim. –”
“But I’m telling the truth!” I screamed. “That didn’t happen, I never said those words!”

“Do you have any proof?! How do I know I can trust you?” He asked with an edge to his voice. I looked at him for a full minute, before getting shakily to my feet, and almost fell over again. He made a weird movement. As if he was about to reach out to help me, but thought better of it.

I took a few steps towards him and reached for his hands, looking deep into his eyes, letting mine do all the talking, because what I felt, couldn’t be put into words. I loved him. More than anything, and it was all I could do to prove it. I was mad at the interview, and the anger hadn’t left me. I was confused as of what was going to happen to us. I was lost, by the idea of what would happen if he didn’t believe me. I’d be alone again, and I’d never find someone to take his place.

“Kendall –“ I began in a whisper, but he jerked his cold hand away and bawled it into a fist beside him.
“Kendall, I love you.” I said between sobs. “I never loved Michael. Or anyone else. All those years, I couldn’t move on, because it was you. I loved you too much to let you go. I was lost. After mom, I had no one, and I was lonelier than ever. And then we all drifted away, I didn’t have anyone. But then you came. You came back into my life and I couldn’t love you more. What makes you think anything has changed?” I asked. He was looking down at the ground.

“Look at me!” I said a little louder. “Please.” I added. He looked up. His face, red, hi eyes, bloodshot and nothing but pain reflected back.

How did that happen? Two people, so in love ten minutes ago, now couldn’t trust each other. Their relationship on the brink of a falling bridge, with only each other to hold on to. But what if one was about to let go? How would the other survive?

“What changed, is that you still love that asshole.” He spoke through gritted teeth.
“But I don’t!” I protested.

“I’m sorry, Kim. But I need time.” He said, and without a backwards glance, he walked away. My heart shattered into a zillion pieces as I saw him leave.

“Kendall, no!” I shouted after him. “No! Please, I love you! Kendall!”

But he never looked back.
No matter how loudly I pleaded,
No matter how many tears I shed,
No matter how many apologies I shouted,
No matter how much I called him back – even after he left, even after I knew he had gone, and left me. He didn’t looked back.
He never returned.
I had lost him….All Over Again.