twenty one pilots imagines (part two)

insecure (josh)

pairing: josh dun x reader
word count: 648
tw: some angst and self deprecation

i scrolled through my phone as i waited for josh, jenna, and tyler to return to the tour bus. normally i'd be with them at the show but i stayed behind just once because i had a migraine. the show was now almost over and i was feeling much better due to the tylenol i took.

i was scrolling through instagram when i saw that josh had posted a shirtless drum photo before he went on stage. it was captioned 'bout to play madison square garden. wish me luck.' i smiled at my handsome boyfriend. gosh i was so lucky to have him. he was literally perfect.

i was scrolling through the comments when i stopped. i saw the familiar username and my heart stopped. debbyryan. josh's ex. she commented 'good luck hottie ;)' i frowned deeply and set my phone down.

why was she commenting that? didn't she dump him three years ago? i had already been with josh for one. didn't she see that? why would she comment that when i was obviously dating josh?

what if her and josh were talking again? no, he would tell me. wouldn't he? was he hiding something?

not that i'd blame him. i wasn't exactly the prettiest. debby was. she was a gorgeous actress. she was model perfect. josh choosing to date me was a complete downgrade.

i then started to cry. i hated how poorly i felt about myself. i felt like josh deserved better than me.

just then the door of the bus opened and jenna, tyler, and josh came in, smiling. but when they saw me crying they stopped.

"what's wrong?" jenna asked me. "did you get hurt?"

"no, i'm fine. how was the show?" i lied. josh shook his head and came up to me.

"i can tell that you're lying. what's wrong?" he asked.

"i'm fine." i insisted.

"let's go to our room for some privacy." josh said to me. he took my hand and we got up and walked to our small room. we sat on the bed and he wiped my tears with his thumbs.

"will you please tell me why you were crying, y/n?" josh asked me. i sighed in defeat.

"i saw that debby commented on your instagram post calling you a hottie." i said.

"that's what made you so upset? you know you're the only girl i'm in love with, right?" josh replied softly. i looked down and nodded. "i mean it, y/n."

"i just let my thoughts get to me. she's an actress and she models and she's just so much prettier than me. i'm a downgrade, josh."

"you are definitely not a downgrade. you are so beautiful and caring and hell you're even sexy."

i blushed at josh's words.

"i love you more than i ever loved debby. i never even brought her on tour with me. you're the only girl i've loved enough to not be able to spend months away from her." josh told me. i looked up at him.

"really?" i asked. he nodded.

"absolutely, baby."

"i love you so much."

"i love you more."

just then there was a knock on the door.

"yeah?" josh replied. tyler peeked his head in.

"jenna and i are gonna go grab taco bell. guys wanna come?" he asked us. josh looked at me and i shook my head.

"nah we'll stay here." josh told tyler.

"okay, we'll be back in an hour."

tyler disappeared and josh looked back at me.

"looks like we've got an hour to ourselves. any suggestions on what we should do?" josh asked me. i smirked and leaned in to kiss him.

"i have an idea." i said when i pulled away. josh smirked.

"i'm listening." he replied. i then leaned it again and we kissed more.