Home for Horny Monsters - Book Six

T'was the Night before Christmas

Asterion bellowed and swung the shovel, launching the massive amount of snow. Mike slid under it, but lost his footing when his boot got caught in the branches of a nearby shrub.

"Shit," he muttered as he tried to free himself without losing his boot.

Asterion shoveled some more snow and held it high, ready to dump it. Kisa leapt from between the shrubs and pulled off her hat, which she pushed over Asterion's eyes.

"Save yours—" she managed before Asterion accidentally dumped the load of snow on himself and Kisa. Both of them went down with a thud.

"Asterion, Kisa, you're out!" Yuki sat on top of an ornamental throne of ice by the front door of the house. She held a steaming cup of hot chocolate in one hand as she surveyed the grounds and acted as the referee.

Mike cursed, then moved away from the spot. He moved through the hedges until he came upon a massive pile of snow with a pair of stony wings sticking out of the top.

"Abella?" He scraped away the snow from where he thought the gargoyle's face would be. When he got to her, she spat out some snow and frowned. "Who did this to you?" he asked.

"I would hate to ruin the surprise," she told him with an emotional smile. "Also, Suly is right behind you."

Mike grabbed a handful of snow and threw it as he turned. The dullahan leaned sideways and allowed his head to drop to the side so that the snowball missed. Suly's gloved hand grabbed tightly onto his hair as he threw a snowball with his free hand. The snowball struck Mike in the leg, but didn't count for an elimination.

"You missed," Sulyvahn declared with a grin as his head swung like a pendulum.

"Maybe," Mike replied. "But she won't."

Sulyvahn's body turned just as Tink leapt on top of the nearby bushes, her club held low. She swung it as hard as she could, firing a packed snowball from the scoop she had carved into the top. Her aim was amplified by the magical goggles on her head, and she hit Sulyvahn between the eyes hard enough that he dropped his head in the snow. His body spasmed dramatically and fell backward into a drift.

"Suly is out!" Yuki declared.

"Tink crush enemies!" she yelled while packing her club with more snow. "No have mercy!"

A massive snowball almost a foot across shot through the air, smashing into Tink so hard that she vanished, her hat and gloves ripped free by the shrubs as she fell. Mike got to his feet to see Bigfoot standing on the other side of Abella's snow pile.

"Tink's out!" Yuki shouted.

"That was a little overboard, wasn't it?" he asked, knowing that Tink was okay. The goblin was tough as nails, and he could already hear her swearing from the other side of the hedge.

"Little booger can take it," Bigfoot told him as he scooped up another massive snowball. "As for you? Let's find out."

When Bigfoot lifted the snowball over his head with both hands, Mike unzipped his jacket and pulled it open. Strapped to his chest was an antique doll with eerie features. The air filled with maniacal laughter as the snowball Bigfoot held smashed onto his head.

"Maybe if you were a yeti, these things wouldn't happen to you." Mike winked.

Bigfoot responded by flipping off Mike with both hands before falling over backward dramatically which sent a cloud of powdered snow up into the air.

"Bigfoot is down," Yuki declared with a grin. "It's one against one, folks!" At the base of her throne, the fairy quartet watched eagerly, all of them cheering in delight. At the windows of the house, several rats spectated the event, including Reggie. They had already put together small flags with the letter B on them that they waved excitedly.