Raising Kiara

30

And I'm most terrified that she'll forget me.

She's only three years old damit.

Those four years were everything to me but she'll barely remember my face by next year.

Give it a few months and she won't be able to recall my voice.

She doesn't know that I had long conversations with my bump or that the day she was born I cried like never before.

She doesn't remember the times I nursed her to sleep, staring into her darker blue eyes and she doesn't remember how big I smiled when she took her first steps.

I've never been so grateful to have started writing these letters than I am now.

When she's old enough to understand, please share them with her.

My baby can't forget me.

-endless love and good luck from Lucia.

Yes the letter had shattered Kian.

It knocked down all of the mended pieces of himself he'd fixed in therapy over the months and had him heaving in a heap on the floor of his bedroom.

He couldn't tell the difference between the dried tear stains Lucia left on the page and his own.

But against every expectation anyone would have, it pushed him to take the risk.

To put his own feelings aside so that his daughter could live.

Because that's what her mother had died for.

If she could consider it back then, then Kian would take the necessary means to give Kiara the life both Lucia and himself have fought so hard for.

To his knowledge, there was nothing that happened that goes against what Lucia planned for.

So it should all be safe for Kiara to live her life as she deserves at last.

Like her mamma wanted.

He'd suck up his tears for a minute and ask Kelly about her plan again.

They'd negotiate a fair deal and enroll Kiara in school with her two best friends.

And when Kian felt it was safe, he'd find her the most prestigious, qualified damn dance school in the world.

Together, they would make her mother proud.

They'd make sure her death wasn't in vain and he'd remind her every single day just how much him and Lucia love her.

He believed that even death hasn't stopped her loving Kiara.

That kind of love can't die.

It's more than just a living organ, it's an energy within a person's soul and science proves that energy cannot be destroyed. Only transferred.

Maybe they could both take a little of that energy and turn it into something beautiful.

Whatever that may be.

As Kian brokenly traces her last words on the page, not knowing how much time has passed, something unexpected catches his eye within the chest of letters.

He inhales a shakey breath that has his whole body shivering and reaches over to inspect the white item.

Another letter.

He wouldn't think anything of it.

How easy it could have been to get caught up in emotion and miss a letter out.