tricks of time ― grayson hawthorne [the inheritance games]

018. DISTORTED MEMORIES

I almost pause for a moment to appreciate the feeling but then stop myself.

"Leah?"

I say her name almost 7 or 8 times before she opens her eyes.

LEAH'S POV:

I open my eyes and immediately squint at the light. My vision goes, then focuses again. I see a face and I smile. Grayson.

"Leah," he says softly. He's not smiling but he doesn't look stony and harsh like he always does. He looks relieved.

I try to gesture toward the windows. "Can we do something about the sun?" I say. "It's too bright."

He nods almost immediately. "Yeah, of course, of course." But before he draws the blinds, he helps me up into a seated position and I feel my head-spin begin to steady. I blink my eyes open with a greatdeal of effort.

"I'm getting the rest of them."

The rest of them? What does he mean? But I don't get an answer, because he dashes through the doorway and I feel my eyes get heavy again.

I hear a stampede of footsteps approaching and I hear Grayson's voice, but I can't make out what he's saying. I look up just in time to have Alisa hand me a cup of water.

"Drink this," Alisa says. "Your body is severely dehydrated." I gulp the water down quickly, surprised by my own thirst. She hand me another glass. I drink that, too. I have to drink five glasses of water before I can hold my head up without immense difficulty. When I finally feel more normal, I look around. Eyes wide open. I have a massive headache, but the other symptoms are beginning to fade.

I see Leslie first. She's standing in a corner of the room, eyes bloodshot,this mornings' clothes rumpled on her body, and she's staring atme with a look of unmasked fear that surprises me. It'sentirely unlike her. Leslie rarely shows emotion in public.

Then I see Alisa. And Oren. It's just the four of them— Alisa, Oren, Leslie, Grayson.

"The light is so strange today," I can't help saying. "Has it ever been this bright?"

Almost like they were synchronized, they all look up at me in confusion. Grayson and Alisa squat down next to me.

"Does your head still hurt? Do you feel dizzy?" She looks at me in concern. A motherly concern.

"My head is killing me," I say, and try to laugh, but it comes out dry and raspy. There are a few seconds of awkward silence.

"What happened to James?"

As soon as Oren mentions his name, my blood goes cold. I freeze. My eyes go wide. They all must've noticed, because he snaps to me.

"What did he do to you, Leah? Or where did he go?"

I feel like telling them nothing. I feel like sleeping and pretending none of this happened. But the memory— the memory of his hands on my body, the memory of his hands touching places where they shouldn't be, makes me sit up straight and firm and tell them everything.

I told them everything that happened after Grayson had left. I told them about how he asked me to the movies. I told them how I felt his mood change when I told him that I didn't want to go. When I got to the part where I felt him, I hesitated. I remembered all of it so perfectly I couldn't bear it.

TW— SA (RETOLD)

"I remember how through the drugs, I felt him take my hand and pulled me close to him. I remember the sickly sweet smell of his cologne and beer and something I couldn't identify. I remember how perfectly I fit in against his body, my head level with his shoulder. Like we were meant to be.

I remember how everything was blurring and spinning together and I couldn't see straight. I remember his hands.

The arm around my back.

The other hand that had slid down to my butt.

But most of all, I couldn't figure out how to tell him to stop."

As I told them the whole story, I could see how the look on their faces growing worse by the minute. I started to hiccup, tear up, and cry.

"I remember wondering where you all were. I remember wondering why you weren't coming to help me.

I most remember him kissing me, hard, sweet and deep. I remember how the kiss nearly knocked me off my feet. But it might have been the drugs.

I remember how he kept kissing me, I remember the feeling of his teeth grinding hard against my lips. I remember gasping for air. It was hard to breathe. I tried to get out of his clutches but I couldn't.

I remember how he talked to me. We were on the ground. Or the bed.

I remember the feeling in my stomach. The knot growing tighter and dropping in the deep crevices of the Earth. I was on the ground and he was on top of me."

I cry harder than I've cried in a while when I remember.

"His lips locked onto mine and I couldn't say anything. I couldn't call for help. I remember clearly how I tried to open my mouth to breathe, to scream, but his hand covered it."

I'm whisked back into the present, tear stained face. I stare at them as I say the last thing I remember.

"I'm trying to remember how we got on the ground or the bed and how it feels like I've been trapped here under him for the last hour."

I tense up as they breathe out about the gravity of what had just unfolded. Alisa is the first to comfort me. She drops her lawyer aura and hugs me and I feel like she's my mother.

"I'm so sorry that happened to you, Honey. I'm so, so, so sorry." I hear her choke back a sob. Leslie plummets towards us and hugs us so tight I feel as if I can't breathe.

I can't breathe.

And then he's back again in my brain and I see him constantly kissing me and I'm gasping for air, some air, any air.

Back to the present.

Grayson's muscles are taut and he's staring down at his feet. He's leaning against the doorway, arms crossed over his chest and feet crossed at the ankle. Oren is running a hand through his hair.

I brush the tears away quickly. Quick, before they come flowing out again.

"I want to press charges," I say, somewhat firmly. "I don't care how long it takes."

authors note

i feel so bad for what's happening to leah. however, i feel as if she's having great character development and i do hope this experience makes her a stronger person in the end.

also, i want to address something - i'm so sorry if any of you have gone through this before. sexual assault and rape is more common than people think, and it's no joke. women (predominantly) but even men, suffer from this constantly all over the world and it's very overlooked in today's society. people (including myself) don't understand how much trauma it can bring to one and how scary the experience must be.

sexual assault hotline (usa): 1-800-656-4673

suicide hotline (usa): 988

police (usa): 911

domestic violence hotline (usa): 800-799-7233

stay safe, everyone.

word count: 1932 words