In Five Years

Chapter 3

Maybe it's because Maddie was my first love. She always will be. They say that it takes the longest to get over your first, and maybe that's just what this is. Maybe it's going to take longer to heal from the breakup with her. Maybe four years wasn't enough time.

"Finally." Katie tugs on my arm when I reach the bottom step. She's waiting by the door, and I lean down to kiss her, cupping her cheek with my hand.

"Sorry, Ethan wanted to talk to me," I say as I pull away. "Are you ready to go?"

Mary is barreling towards us though with a plate wrapped in tinfoil. "Wait!" She calls out. "I have some cookies for you both to bring home."

She pulls me in for a warm embrace as Katie sends her a smile and takes the plate. It's not until I go to pull away that she says, "I'm sorry about Maddie, honey. We didn't know she would be here until the last minute."

Clearing my throat awkwardly, Katie furrows her eyebrows together in confusion as she looks from me to Mary. "Sorry, but why is it a problem if Maddie is here?"

Mary laughs nervously when she realizes she just let out a truth I hadn't gotten around to yet. "Oh dear," she says. "I, um...have to get back to the party."

Katie hands the plate back to me and storms outside, and I quickly follow on her heels until we reach my car. "Katie." I grasp onto her wrist so that she'll turn to face me. "I was going to tell you, I just—"

"When were you going to tell me?" She blinks away tears. "You talk about her all the time, but I just thought she was your childhood best friend. I didn't think you guys had a past."

"We only dated for like a month," I say, and that seems to calm her down for the time being. "It didn't work out between us."

"Why?" She asks.

"Because—" I stop myself, trying to come up with a reasonable excuse. "Because we were going separate ways. She didn't want to be in a long-distance relationship, and we both needed to have time to find ourselves after high school."

"Oh, great." She tosses her hands up and throws open the passenger side door. "So she's the one that ended things."

"What does that have to do with anything?" I grab onto her wrist again before she can get into the car. "Katie," I whisper, setting the plate of cookies on top of the car, "I'm with you for a reason, alright? Maddie and I aren't together anymore. It's been years since we dated."

I tilt her chin up with my fingertips and kiss her gently, trying to let her know how much she means to me. It doesn't take long before her hands come around the sides of my face to pull me closer, and I let my hands travel down her back.

"Okay, let's go home," she pants, and the look in her eye lets me know that she wants me and that all is forgiven. I've grown accustomed to it.

"Well, we could..." I inch her back towards the car, and she hits me swiftly on the shoulder.

She giggles. "Absolutely not. Sex is for the bedroom."

Immediately, like a switch goes off, images of Maddie flood back in. I don't want them to, and I try to force them out, but I picture her in my car, riding the shit out of me. I remember the weekend at the Grand Canyon when I took her in that bathroom stall. She was ready for me at all times, and the sex we had was so...hot.

What the fuck am I even doing right now?

Letting out another sigh, I grab the cookies from the top of the car and go around to the driver's seat.

I'm not going to keep thinking about Maddie. She said she wanted a five-year plan, and even when we get there we will still have to be long-distance. It's never going to work between us and I just have to accept that. I need to move on.