Real World Pains

Prologue

There once was a girl, she was full of hope and love. She loved everything and everyone. She didn't know the dangers of the world; she was at her own peace. She was protected, she was loved, she was the one. Her young mind never knew there were dangers in her 'perfect' world. She was only five years old when her world came crashing down.

At the age of five, she experienced her first 'real-world pain'. A pain that nobody should ever have to experience. But alas she was still too young to realize that what happened to her was wrong. That what that man did to her was wrong.

She started school soon after, the first three years going by fast and splendidly. She had her very first friend that wasn't family. She thought she was on top of the world. Still being protected by the ones who loved her.

Year four, on the other hand, that's when she experienced her second 'real-world pain'. Again, a pain that nobody should experience. But alas she was still too young to realize that what happened to her was wrong. What those children said to her was wrong.

It continued throughout years five and six. Year six was a bit different though, she was now eleven years old. And her second 'real-world pain' widened to another experience, not only were the students being mean to her but now it was a teacher. In her mind she was confused, why was a teacher being mean to her? Weren't they supposed to be kind and care for their students?

Confused and saddened, she no longer felt at peace. How could she? With her classmates being mean to her to now a teacher continuing with the bullying as well.

Nonetheless, she spent a lot of her time in year six in her guidance counselor's office. Her guidance counselor was her savior. Her guardian. She now felt safe again, well as safe as she could with what was going on behind closed doors.

Further, into year six, she confided in her guidance counselor with a troubling statement. They had just finished watching a documentary that was mandatory for all the students in the school to watch.

She now knew that what happened at the young age of five was wrong. What that man did to her was wrong, the multiple times that happened to her... it was all wrong.

So, she confided in her guidance counselor after that class and told her what happened to her at the young age of five.

What she did not expect though, was the moment she stepped foot into her house she would see her mother crying. Why was the girl's sweet mother crying?

She found out her firstborn was being molested by her own boyfriend, the guy that claimed he was the girl's father.

She found out that her firstborn has been enduring this pain for years and didn't know that it was wrong.

She lost the trust in a man that was supposed to be her daughters' father.

The man was out of the girl's life that day, to never be seen again.

And everything was okay then.

Or so the mother thought.

Year seven, the girl's first year in middle school. The girl thought she was free from the pain she felt throughout the last years of elementary.

She was wrong.

The words she was given by her fellow classmates turned to fists. Not only was she being mistreated by the harsh words her classmates would give her, but she would be shoved around too.

With the harsh reality that the bullying would never stop, her world crashed down once again.

But it didn't stop there, oh no. That would be too easy.

The girl found out a secret her mother had been hiding from her and her sister.

The man that ruined her at the young age of five, was in fact not her biological father.

Her mother lied to her, now she has experienced her third 'real-world pain'. Once again, a pain that should never happen to anybody. She lost her hope of what a real family was. Who was her biological father? Her mother still didn't tell her. Her mother kept that a secret.

In year eight, she found out her mom was seeing someone. She was happy for her mother. She seemed to really like this guy.

Year nine remained the same for the girl, middle school was harsh on the girl. She didn't know why she was being treated the way she was. She lost any love for herself.

Not only that, she experienced her fourth 'real-world pain'. It was an eerily quiet night. She and her sister were told to stay in her sister's room.

That night she saw her stepdad raise his hand to her mother. In year nine, she lost the trust she had for the man.

Year ten, her first year of high school. Would this year be different? Only one could hope. And all that hope was just that, hope. Nothing changed, the abuse she got from her fellow classmates was the same. Except for this year, she found a way out of that pain.

Fourteen years old, she experienced her fifth 'real-world pain'. Once again, a pain nobody should have to go through. She found a way out of her pain. It wasn't a complete step out, just a few small seconds of relief.

The pain she felt in those few seconds of relief was nothing compared to the years of abuse she endured. To her, this pain was heaven. She didn't have anyone causing pain to her, she was the one creating the pain. And in those moments, she forgot. She let herself forget what happened to her. The tears running down her face, she forgot. She let herself feel numb for the first time.

And that pain, would be forever sketched into her skin forever.

Year eleven, was a year of confusion for the girl. She didn't feel normal. She hasn't felt normal in a long time, but this year was different. She didn't know why she was looking at girls like how she should be looking at guys. She was looking at both genders the same way.

She kept those thoughts to herself.

Year twelve, she's confirmed her sexuality, she was happy with herself. She finally wasn't confused anymore. She confided in one of her best friends... and they started dating. The girl was so happy. Even with the bullying continuing. She was finally happy.

Until her sister found out. Her sister was close to her. Not as close as she wishes she was with her. She found out by one of the girl's friends. It was an accident; the girl's friend didn't mean to out her to her sister.

But unknowingly to that friend, she experienced her sixth 'real-world pain'. She was forced to tell her mom and stepdad.

She already knew their beliefs of homosexuality. She was scared. How would they react to her coming out? She didn't even want to come out in the first place.

She wrote a letter and left it in her mother's truck. She was filled with anxiety that day.

And that anxiety did not go away when she got home.

She was called to go outside under the canopy they had beside the front porch. There sat her mother and her stepdad.

Harsh words were given to her that day, words she will never forget.

That day she lost the feeling of love from her mother.

Remember back in year ten? Where she found relief in harming herself? Well, that hasn't changed. This time was a bit different though, not only were words scarred into her skin by a blade sharper than a butcher's knife but pills were swallowed down her throat. She wanted to die.

She woke up the next morning with a terrible headache and a stomachache. She failed.

Year thirteen, her last year in high school. She was finally in her last year of hell. She was happy. She wanted the year to hurry up so she wouldn't have to endure the pain of what classmates caused her. She kept to herself a lot that year, she lost a bunch of friends the past few years. She didn't want to go through any more pain than she had to. Year thirteen kind of went by in a blur. She was thankful.

But now, she must step foot into the real world.

Was she ready?