Captain Swan - A Date for the Holidays (and everyday too would be nice)

The Arrangement

Emma hates Christmas.

Actually, she hates all holidays, but she especially hates Christmas.

No, hate is too kind a word. She detests Christmas.

She detests the expectations that always accompany this stupid sham of a holiday. Having to dress up, because if she wears jeans and a t-shirt, her mother greets her at the door with, “This is what you wear to Christmas dinner? Don’t you even own a dress?” instead of asking how she’s doing. Having to plaster on a fake smile, even though she’s completely miserable and dying inside, otherwise her father will ask her, “Why the long face, princess?” Not to mention the entire ridiculous gift-giving process—racking her brain for months, trying to figure out what to get everyone, waiting until the last minute and having to fight the crowds of other last-minute shoppers and standing in ridiculously long lines to buy gifts no one ever appreciates anyway.

Oh, and her very favorite thing about Christmas—receiving backlash for being single, because apparently, it’s a crime these days.

“Why didn’t you call Walsh?” Emma’s cousin, Anna, asked, to which her husband, Kristoff, added, “He seems like a nice guy.” Maybe, but only if you’re a customer at Wizard of Oak.

“It’s been six months since that jerk cheated on you; you gotta get out there,” said Elsa, who lost her husband three years ago and hasn't been on a single date since then. But she has two kids, so she's off the hook.

And her own brother, Leo, teased her— “You know it’s a holiday when my sister shows up alone”—right before he proposed to his girlfriend of five months. Their parents are so unbelievably proud.

Which is just fucking perfect because now Emma's the only person in her family who either isn’t married or doesn’t have kids.

Even her Aunt Rubes didn’t show up at Christmas alone; she brought home the mall Santa.

“You’d be surprised by the quality of men you can meet at the mall,” Aunt Ruby said with a Cheshire cat grin.

Emma cocked her head and pursed her lips as she watched Ruby’s date fill his plate to the brim like he hadn’t eaten in days. But judging by the size of his gut, he clearly had. “I don’t think I would be, actually.”

Aunt Ruby rolled her eyes. “Relax, it’s not like I’m going to marry him. He’s just my holidate,” she said casually, taking a sip of her wine as though she didn’t just say the most ridiculous thing ever.

Emma raised her brows. “Holidate?”

“You know? A date solely for the holidays. No commitment, no expectations. And no more spending another holiday alone.”

“Huh.” Emma nursed her hot cocoa with cinnamon and whipped cream, mulling over her aunt’s tactics. She didn’t think it was a bad idea, actually...if you wanted to bring a strange man home to eat all your food and be around the little ones.

Aunt Ruby turned her head to look at Emma and smirked, her eyes lighting up with an idea. “Want me to see if he has a friend?”

Emma cringed. “Thanks, but I’ll pass.”

And it turns out, being thirty doesn’t help much either.

In fact, now everyone has it in their heads she’s letting herself go. Okay, so she likes to binge on chocolate and junk food, but she’s always had a high metabolism and her job as a bail-bonds woman keeps her in shape. But apparently, her mother thinks being thirty means everything Emma eats will go to her hips, because why else would the woman buy her pajama pants twice as big as last year’s?