𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 ☆

Ⅴ

𝙞 𝙙𝙤𝙣'𝙩 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞 𝙖𝙢 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚. 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙞 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙢𝙞𝙧𝙧𝙤𝙧, 𝙞 𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙗𝙪𝙩 𝙖 𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙨𝙤𝙪𝙡 𝙩𝙧𝙮𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙤 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙞𝙩'𝙨 𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙚𝙚𝙥 𝙨𝙚𝙖 𝙤𝙛 𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙮. 𝙞𝙨 𝙢𝙮 𝙨𝙤𝙪𝙡 𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙙 𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧? 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙗𝙤𝙙𝙮 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚, 𝙝𝙚𝙡𝙥 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙖𝙮 𝙤𝙪𝙩.

𝐳𝐞𝐧𝐞 𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐚 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭
———
"get it together zene." i looked into the mirror trying to relax myself.

i stared at my roughed up appearance. i look like i just went through hell and came back to earth.

my normally groomed hair is in the same bun that it has been in for the past week. my bright red eyes had dark circles and bags around them. my face was pale, i hadn't eaten in days and i look an absolute mess.

⚠️TW: SELF HARM⚠️

i rolled up the sleeves of my hoodie, staring down at the old scars of slits going down my left arm.

"okay." i breathed out going into my cabinet that had a fresh package of blades.

i grabbed one out of it, and tears fell out my eyes as i slid it smoothly across the previous wounds, making deeper cuts.

"fuck." i hissed as my wrist started bleeding out and i threw the blade on the counter.

grabbing my weed tray, i sat on the floor and began rolling up as blood trickled down my hand and onto the tray.

i reached over and grabbed a lighter from off of the floor before sparking up the blunt.

taking a long pull out of it, i blew smoke out of my nose and mouth.

i spent about an hour there on my bathroom floor, just laid out thinking about everything.

i got up and rinsed the dried up blood off of my hand before going back into my messy bedroom.

i don't even know where my phone is, i threw it somewhere and i'm almost 100% positive that it broke.

grabbing the picture of my father and i off the nightstand, i laid back on my bed staring at it.

"damn pops, really been four years without you already." a tear fell out my eye as i admired the way he smiled at me in the picture.

"nae." i heard and then looked up at who was there.

"ya door was wide open girl the fuck wrong witchu?" sai asked walking over to me and pulling me up into a hug.