𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐆𝐥𝐨𝐰ᴿᵉᵍᵘˡᵘˢ ᴮˡᵃᶜᵏ

ɪ. ᴘᴇʀꜰᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ɪꜱ ᴀ ᴅᴇʟᴜꜱɪᴏɴ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰᴇᴇʙʟᴇ-ᴍɪɴᴅᴇᴅ

❝𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐬. 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐨𝐨?❞

꘎♡━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♡꘎

I saw it in a hazy tint of red and black. Blood. The whole world was covered with gauze, sans the texture, and I felt that everything would fall apart at a given moment. It was something tangible that I had never experienced before, something that induced in me an inescapable; a lingering fear that might haunt me till the end of my days.

I decided that I hated dreams as I woke up that morning, glistening with a sheen of sweat under the light of the sun that filtered in through the spaces in my curtains. The candle that lay at my bedside dripped wax on the supple wood underneath it, and I sighed before untangling myself from my covers and getting out of bed.

I stretched out, and it seemed as though some joints in my body cracked as I took the first step to getting rid of the stiffness from a night of restless sleep.

My sleeping pattern had been messed up since I was engaged to Avery, nightmares of domestic life in the house of a man who was a Death Eater were bound to be scary.

But what confused me was the vagueness of my nightmares. It was as though they were all just flares of light, swirling around in a vacuum and tinted with red and minuscule blind spots in between. In the end, it was nothing if not disorientating, and it scared, terrified me as I saw it flash before my eyes each and every night.

I got out of bed, stepping into the fluffy slippers as I hurriedly removed the nightgown that hung on a hook next to my bed off and pulled it on over my camisole and underwear sleeping suit.

I start to walk, but my feet ache with the stiffness that a night of stillness had caused. I ever so badly wanted to drag my feet, but I knew that if I were to be married to Avery, I could not afford to be anything but a lady.

So I lifted my feet and put all of my efforts into floating, the way my mother had told me a lady should walk.

It was quite difficult to do that so early this morning, but practice makes perfect. Which was my only motive to be.

Strange word, is it not? Perfect. It varies for every person, and yet it can hardly ever be found easily. They can scour the world, rent apart oceans, crumble mountains, get the sky to bed at their will and still not find it.

It was like they desired something that was so unreachable, yet so close that they could just reach out their fist and catch some of that magical gold dust in their hand.

It was something that was theoretical; in reality perfection was a delusion. A delusion for those who had never been put to face the cruel reality of the world and had been blanketed in the warmth of ignorance.

Yet, they said that there was something in the world that was perfect for a particular person. It catered to all their needs, molded them into something better, brought out the best in them. It was perfection that one would be lucky to find.

I was yet to find that perfection, but little did I know that when I did, it would come with the warm caresses and the bitter-sweet feelings of Regulus Black's fingertips.

But what I would be blissfully unaware of until it came was the fact that on losing that bit of perfection, a person is broken on the inside. Like a china doll with shattered edges, glistening at the points where the paint hasn't chipped off.

I shook my head, willing it to clear out all thoughts. All of my silly daydreams.

I got into the bathroom with some fresh clothes and got into the bath.

It was simple, just the way Trinkly knew I liked it to be drawn.

The warm water soaked all the way to my bones, and I sighed in contentment as all the tiredness, fatigue, and aches in my body were soaked by the water.

Perfect, perfection was a delusion. The scars, scabs, scratches, and ashes would be everywhere. Under the girl in tight corsets and dresses, lipstick drawn lips stretching and curving to smile, white teeth showing, and blond hair tied up impeccably; was a scared person.

I was scared of many things, the fear like one of the many spots of black that marred a perfect, silver person.

But I learned to hide it well, and over the years I had taken to painting it over in a delicate shade of gold whenever I was around others, harming my own self in the intricate process of hiding my flaws.

Maybe it was the sadness at not having free will. Maybe it was the hatred and anger towards herself for letting myself be portrayed as weak. To not give in to those internal screams, shouts, and cries of pain that stifled my body. It killed me on the inside, quick, silent and lethal. Pulling me in and drowning me in it.

So no, I wasn't perfect. Not even close to the golden girl of the Greengrass family.

My mind was spinning around, slowly and painfully. My mind flashed to the night it all happened, the lipstick painted light pink lips, curled hair, sharp cheekbones, and high-heeled shoes that clicked as I walked.

Red vine tinted vision as I twirled around the ballroom, a haze clouding my dance with Avery. His hand resting uncomfortably on my hips as the back of my bell skirt floated behind me. My hand on his shoulder, long vine colored nails resting delicately on his back, gingerly, as though by merely touching him my life would be bound to him. Our other hands are intertwined, his grip more frightening than comforting.

A warm smile cast down at me knowingly, as though he genuinely wanted to spend time with me. My chin up, yet eyes downcast as I was taught to do.

"Look up at me, please, Ms. Greengrass."

His deep voice resonating around as I look up into those eyes.

"Yes?" meek voice, yet some substance behind it as I stare into his eyes.

"So, how do you feel about our parents' decision?" His face set into a carefully poker expression as he looked down at me, trying to muster some amount of warmth.

"What decision?" I caught sight of a genuinely angered expression, as he urgently asked, "They didn't tell you?"

That was a part of the night that sealed my fate, bound me to Avery.

Maybe it was meant to be that I was never meant to find love for myself and instead fall into the web of an arranged marriage as it engulfed me.

Maybe it was the right thing, and maybe it wasn't. But what I did know was that it was something that had to be done readily.

Which was why I got out of the tub and stood facing the mirror, ready to start the new day.

And as I stared at the mirror, I saw flashes of what could be if I was the perfect girl they wanted me to be. 

Adhara's Letters!

Know who's excited about this? Me! I am!

*looks around* No, no one else?

Well, anyway,

QOTD: Leora, the baby. What'd you think of her?

Yes, I'm done now, bye!

Loads of Love,

Adhara!