Days in November

November, 2

2

The alarm was meant to go off in three minutes but Louise was already up and heading to the bathroom to relive the tightness in her lower abdomen. She bounced from the sink, to her phone and back on the bed, immediately scrolling through her social media to settle for videos that she couldn't watch when her internet connection exhausted.

Some videos were tiring, others made her feel what a teenager shouldn't feel so early in the morning and the rest, she either skipped or downloaded to watch during the day.

When she woke up again after falling asleep towards six in the morning, the sun was up, close to eight. Bathroom once more to take a shower despite the iced chilly water, Louise returned back to bed to watch the videos she'd downloaded earlier.

There wasn't a plan for today, just like the others. Lounge in bed all day and try to find something to eat, which she did all till it was evening and her tanktop was starting to dampen with the heat.

Bits of her were torn to sleep inorder to pass time till the electricity would turn back up but she was saved from that thinking by the brief siren that alerted her.

Phone plugged in to charge, Louise went to the kitchen again to look at the pot of spaghetti and then the sachet of chocolate drinks she could drink once the kettle on the stove would bring the water to a boil. Trees and empty roads were the scenery provided and she wasn't into the television as she once was. Yet without internet connection, she couldn't do much than to repeatedly watch shows she'd already seen.

Close to the evening that would blur the timeline towards night, she made an effort to think about getting dressed for a couple of videos since the one she wished would text didn't bother replying after the message he'd viewed less than a day ago.

It hurt.

Maybe too bad but one thing Louise was starting to learn was how to value and appreciate her progress. Provided that she still couldn't control her sarcasm nor blunt replies and apparent fluency in killing the joy out of a lot of things due to her skills in English, Louise was prepared to be alone and grow in private.

While she slipped on the chocolate tea and chewed on bread, she hated the trickle of disgust that went down her spine from the earlier masturbation session.

She really needed a solution to it.

Not when she was tired of thinking she wanted it even when she didn't need to.

~

Louise completed her first stitch, staring at the mini skirt she had crocheted and stared back at her in its beautiful yellows and reds. Slowly, she would get better.

She had that feeling reassuring her while she contemplated making ramen for dinner. It didn't turn out how she wanted but it was better than starving all through the day.

Would he text her back soon?

Even if he didn't, she was happy November was teaching her that she was no one's priority. Yes, after themselves, the next person/friend they would think about wouldn't be her. No one was hers.

And that truly sucked.