Forbidden

Sixteen

"Alright spill the beans you two." A thick British accent spilled over her apartment table. Cara stabbed at her salad, demanding their explanation for being so distant and cold with each other. She didn't know the story, but she had caught the two of them comfy with each other more than once. However it had been a while and now it was like the two would burn each other if their skin did so much as brush against one another.

There was a silence, one that taylor nor Karlie were ready to fill. Cara raised her brow, "A few months ago I would have let you two girls in a room and that lingerie from the show and--" both girl's had raised there brows and Cara stopped her perverted mind, "That's besides the point, you two have been acting weird. You can't even look at each other." She shoved salad in her mouth, feeling the awkward tension that even she had began to feel.

"We just..." Karlie started, "We had..an argument and got into it."

"About?"

"Stuff--" Karlie was cut short.

"We were dating before she got engaged to Josh." Taylor blurted out. She had not told a sole. The blonde had held it in for months, with the exception of the entries in her journal and her once mascara stained pillows.

"We weren't dating, we were...we were involved."

"Involved?" Taylor retorted in a harsh tone. "You and Josh are "involved". You told me you didn't love him. You told me you loved me. Does that mean anything to you?" Her voice was strained.

Cara sat there, half way through chewing a crouton and too surprised to finish at their sudden outburst.

"Shut up!" Karlie spat, "Just shut up! You know I messed up! I messed up, are you happy? I screwed us up by engaging to him. I panicked--I passed out for God's sake Taylor--I was scared." She breathed, "I've regretted it every single day. I have. But I am human and...I couldn't....I couldn't hurt him. I didn't know how and It wasn't his fault...and I screwed up. I'm sorry." She said the last to words sternly, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And I know that will never be enough."

Taylor stayed quiet, her eyes staying low for a moment, then looking over to the woman's ring finger. It was gone. The thing she had grown to hate so much was gone. "Where's your ring?" She murmured and Karlie swallowed, "I broke up...I ended it." She let out a harsh laugh, "I've officially screwed everyone over."

Cara had decided to finish chewing but about choked at the idea of Karlie throwing off her engagement. "You what?" She furrowed her eye brows, "Wait let me get this straight.. You two are...whatever you are. And you," her attention went to Karlie, "Agreed to get engaged with Josh, and now you've broken up with him because you still feelings for Taylor?"

Karlie thought for a moment and to put things into perspective, Cara was generally correct. The girl nodded, not daring to look at Taylor just yet. Once again, this was a plan based of hopes and not real support.

Cara nodded and ate one last bite, "And this is where I leave." She nodded and walked over to their side of the table, kissing both their heads as if they were her children. She told them to be good and she'd talk to them later. With that, the girl left leaving Taylor and Karlie sitting at the table, side by side and alone.

"I love you Taylor, don't ever question that." She murmured, but it was stern. As if she had lost everything but she was sure as hell going to let the girl know through it all she still loved her.

Taylor sighed heavily before putting her elbows on the table and putting her face in her hands.

Karlie wanted to reach over and comfort her, however, for the time being she decided against it. Knowing it wasn't exactly her place. "Tell me what you want me to do." Karlie spoke softly, watching the girl, her gaze becoming softer, regretting raising her voice earlier.

"I don't know what I want Karlie...I know what I want but it's not right. Not after what you put me through." She murmured, rubbing her temples. "But at the same time I've been gripping about forgetting what everyone else thinks so who am I to think this way.." The blonde was more so whispering to herself at this point and Karlie cracked a half hearted, fake, sympathy filled smile.
"I want you. I want us. Whatever we were before...I want it back. That's all I know." She kept her head down. "This is all mess."
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