Obsidian & Bronze {Fred Weasley}

49. The Goodbye

I looked at the lace, hanging across the chairs, and thought of my mother, the blue of her eyes, unlike Sirius's watery iridescence, hers burnt, in a warm and pressure heavy sort of way, in a way that held you tight enough to make the world stop.

And then there was Remus. There was always Remus. Stood at the end of the aisle. His rosey cheeks plump and full as he held a warming grin, his eyes glassy and full as fought with the urge to cry.

I thought back to the day I started Hogwarts. Sitting on the cold stone floor just outside The Great Hall, my back pressed against the wall, longing for it to be his chest. I'd never felt anger towards Remus like I did that day, and yet now, it's so strange, because I can't ever imagine feeling like that ever again.

Sirius stood beside him, watching me walk, like he has never seen another human walk so well before, and I took pride in knowing he took pride in me. I never thought I'd let him in, I didn't think I had the strength. Ironic, considering he was the strength I needed all along.

I remember looking at the sun, all those years, wondering if Sirius was looking too, knowing that it was my sun, his sun, something we shared without even realising, something that united us. The sun wouldn't be there for him when it is there for me. Not if I would be in New York.

I studied the rows of people as I walked up towards the front, catching Tonks holding the baby close to her chest, her sleepy head propped into the crock of her neck. William tried so hard to focus, and yet his attention was completely encompassed by their new baby girl.

Eloise Andromada Weasley. She was beautiful. I remember that day they brought her home, holding her in my arms, her tiny hands curling around my finger. Fred had made an offhand remark about what a good mother I'd be. I immediately gave her back, I couldn't think about a future with Fred, not knowing what I had yet to tell him.

I reached the front of the aisle, pulling both boys in a hug, inhaling the scent of parchment and tea, a slight lingering of firewhiskey and musky perfume, it was the smell of home.

Fred went and stood on the left, with Harry, whilst I moved over to the right and stood with Draco. It was odd, the people I now considered family. Not so long ago it was simply just Remus. It never occurred to me it would be anything more. It never occurred to me that it could be anything more.

"You about to cry?" Draco teased in a hushed whisper and I took my place beside him, handing him my bouquet.

"Fuck off" I scoffed, snatching back the flowers and planting a kiss on his cheek. I think it was in that exact moment hell froze over.

The ceremony was everything. Every unspoken word, every lost letter, every time either of them ever bit their tongues against their better judgement, nothing was left unsaid. It had never occurred to me that love could have an image, and yet the most perfect example had been there all along.

The ceremony dispersed soon after it finished, transforming into a ballroom, the lights came down and the music grew louder, and soon an electrified buzz filled the room, the smell of spicy liquor and something sweet like chocolate melting through the heated air.

I found myself mixing a drink, firewhiskey and lemonade, by the bar soon after the party began, the sound of laughing and life unraveling behind me, the life I was soon to be leaving. I dare not turn around.

"Hey" A soft voice whispered, beginning to mix a drink beside me, bumping his shoulder with mine, "How are you holding up?"

I smiled up at Harry, his jade eyes burnt through the glass of his lenses, and then right through me, he had that ability, to turn my stone walls to glass in a way no one else ever could.