Endless (Reckless #2)

Endless - Chapter Six

“You know, I don’t forgive you. I can’t forgive you. Everything you did to me - every punch I got from you - I will always remember them. Because how can you forget something that left scars on you? That’s just it - you can’t. Because they’re there - forever. And you did that to me. You scarred me.

“I’m not really sure why I came here. I just felt like I needed to end this - whatever the h*ll this is. I feel like I need to give up everything that I’ve let push me down. I’ve already let the girl go. I’ve fixed things with Mom. And now, now it’s you.”

I stand up, wiping off the dirt from my jeans, “So I guess this is it. I won’t be coming back. The only way I’ll ever think of you, is to remind myself that I’ve been through worse. I’m going to live my life; live my life the best that I can and never once think of everything you put me through.”

Turning around, I walk away from the one thing that I’ve kept bottled in my mind - the one thing that kept me from many things. I don’t say goodbye. It’s not the right term for leaving someone behind for good.

I just walk away.

***

“Dude, it’s your f*cking birthday. It’s a tradition to get drunk.”

Kane took me to a bar - surprise, surprise. I told him I let her go. I even told him that I let my father go too. So he said that we should have a celebration - for my birthday and for finally getting my a** together.

So we’re at a random bar, drinks being piled in front of us. Girls are, as usual, literally lining up to throw themselves at us. Kane has made out with every single one. Me - well, I’ve ignored every single one.

I know I should just move on - forgive and forget, right? I told myself that I would leave her behind and forget.

I need to.

So I do the first thing that I can think of - something to start over.

I down a shot glass, letting the alcohol burn my throat. I take another one. And another one.

The buzz of the alcohol hits me at around the twelfth drink. I haven’t gotten this drunk in a while. After I watched my dad drink his life away, I wanted nothing to do with it. All it does is mess with your f*cking head. But I need this. I need this.

After about the - God knows how many drinks - I’m feeling the rush of adrenaline running through me. The pulse of the music surrounds me as I start to stand up, looking around the room.

I don’t know what I’m looking for.

But I have an urge to do something.

Something that I haven’t done in a while.

I don’t remember how I got up on the stage or how the microphone even got into my hand. I don’t even remember choosing a song to sing; the words sort of flowed out of my mouth.

“Tell me,

I need to know.

Where do you wanna go?

‘Cause if you're down,

I'll take it slow.

Make you lose control.”

The riled up crowd focuses on me singing, something that I haven’t done since I last saw the girl who’s left my life for good. I feel the beat of the music and the feeling of familiarity from singing. It feels good.