Harder Than Ever After [H. Scott]

13

Esther sits on the small sofa in Hardin's hotel room as he sits on the edge of the bed in just shorts. He rubs his hands together. "I'm glad you're here." He says after a while of silence.

Esther smiles small. "I figured we needed to talk."

Hardin nods small. "Absolutely..." He looks at her through his long lashes.

Esther clears her throat. "I... I'm too deep into this to give up on you." She admits.

Hardin can't help but smile a little. "Me too."

"But I can't forgive you. Not just like that." She clicks her fingers. "And whatever trust we had, it's gone.".

Hardin is silent for a moment, staring at the horrible pattern on the floor. "I get that... I hate it, but I understand. But I promise I'm gonna earn your trust back somehow. Because I love you." He stares at her.

"And as much as I hate to admit it right now, I love you to." She looks down at her lap taking a deep breath. "I need you to tell me everything that happened. Do not spare any details."

Hardin visibly cringes but he nods once. "I met Theresa because she was room mates with an old acquaintance in college. Steph. She was a piece of work." He scoffs a bit. "But she bought Tessa to a party and it pissed me off a little - I didn't understand why Steph was so set on corrupting Tessa. But a girl I was shagging at the time, Molly, she dared me to kiss Tessa. I... I don't know what came over me but I told her I could make her fall in love with me and turn it off - like that." He snaps his fingers, staring at the floor.

Esther frowns deeply. "But... Why?"

Hardin simply shrugs. "I dunno. I honestly can't think of a valid reason. The Hardin back then, however, was set on pleasing everyone. I wanted everyone to see me as this heartless enigma, famous ladies man with no emotional ties. This, in my eyes, was the only way to show it."

"So what did you do?" She whispers.

"I did exactly what I said. I made Tessa fall in love with me. Stupid thing was I fell in love with her in return. I couldn't turn it off, I couldn't stop thinking about her. She was the first woman I ever let close to me other than mum." He admits, glancing at Effie to guage her reaction. Apart from the frown, she isn't showing much.

"How did she find out? Coz I'm guessing she did and it wasn't coz you told her." Esther says.

"Molly told her. Humiliated her in front of what I used to call my friends. She had video proof and everything." He sighs and rubs his head. He hates talking about this but he wants to be entirely truthful with Esther. "It took a lot to gain her trust back - I don't know if I ever fully did because all we ever did was argue. It wasn't a relationship, it was sex and aggression until one of us couldn't take it anymore. Normally one of us would cave and let the other back in."

"Is that what this is?" Esther whispers. "Some fun until one of you caves?"

Hardin glares. "Don't be fucking stupid!" He snaps.

"Don't fucking swear or snap at me." Esther snaps back.

Hardin exhales sharply. "No. It had been almost a year since she left me when I met you. I met you at the right time. And with you, everything is so different and easy and I need it. I want it more than anything. Apart from the Tessa situation, I never lied to you, Esther, I swear on my life." Hardin places his hands over his racing heart.

Esther watches him, picking at a bit of skin on her nails. She's silent for a moment. "OK."

Hardin frowns. "Okay? Okay what?"