Shaun And Lea: Made for each other

Part 2: A brief history of how we got here.

Hershey and memories about Shaun

Life really is full of twists and turns and proves to us that we have no control over anything, least of all ourselves. And it showed me that many times as I built my story with Shaun. One of them happened months after our first kiss, during my time in Hershey, when I went to find out that that trip and Shaun meant a lot to me and were the only good memories I clung to when things started to get tough at home.

I missed Shaun. I thought of him every day, those sparkling blue eyes looking out the window at the tomato juice. I remembered him as I passed the pine tree trail on my way to gym class. I even created a playlist of the songs that played in the car as we drove aimlessly down the road. I wondered if Shaun had ever listened to them after that day. He didn't seem to mind when I turned up the volume.
My memories of Shaun have frustrated me for a while, especially since he never called me. But I never called him either, partly because I was proud and also because I didn't know if Shaun would like it or react well to it or if he would take the time to talk to me. I knew, the residency required a lot of commitment from him. It wasn't hard for Shaun to concentrate on his work, he loved it and I know he was one of the best residents.
And on the other hand, what was I expecting? To get a post-first date phone call? No, I couldn't and shouldn't expect that from him. After all, I wished the kisses had meant nothing to him. And as it turned out, I concluded harshly, they really didn't.
__No connections, the proof I needed to put the story behind me. It's better this way__ was what I said to keep the frustration at bay. Without success.
Sometimes I couldn't help but imagine that at any time of the day my cell phone would ring with a call from Shaun asking me to pick him up at the airport.
The news that he had considered moving to Hershey as soon as I decided to return home caught me with a mild and pleasant surprise. It made me vain to know that part of that decision was motivated because of me. Would he really? I thought. Although I thought it would be crazy and too risky for him, a less rational part of me felt a strange thrill at the glimpse of the idea that Shaun would be in Hershey.
But good thing, in the end his rationality, and I suppose, some sage advice from Glassy spoke louder. I was already anxious that I was risking too much, I didn't wish the same for him. And I didn't want Shaun to be frustrated by the consequences of a bad decision. I wanted no part of it, and I certainly would have because I couldn't even try to stop him.
To end my illusions I kept coming up with the fact that Shaun wouldn't call me and I never had the courage to call him either.
And so it was with Se's daily assumptions that I went through the five months.

First plan thwarted

When I settled in Hershey I tried to focus on the workshop projects, in the beginning everything was going well, we had many clients, we were making money and things seemed to get better every day. But the glory phase lasted exactly four months. Then came the decline phase.
Donnie and I got carried away and started spending more than we could afford on parts and accessories, on renovations in the space to attract customers' attention. Before we knew it, we were swamped with debt and not enough cash to pay it off. As a solution we sold parts, so we started to refurbish cars for prices well below what the service was worth.
And every day Donnie and I fought more frequently, always blaming each other for the imminent bankruptcy of the shop. We were two stubborn and proud people who refused to admit our own mistakes. Our relationship was never the best, and when we lost the workshop together it collapsed.

Disagreements, hard truths and a reason to go

My parents never assumed it in front of me, but I know that they also thought it was all on me, after all, I had done something crazy by quitting a great job and refusing a pay raise to take a chance on the workshop that was supposed to be better off before me. The climate was becoming unbearable, every day I faced the worried and pitying looks from my parents and the judgments from my brother.
Until one day I faced the fact that it was a bad idea to go back and that I always fail with my choices.
__What's up, little sister? When are you running away again?__He said in a sarcastic tone.