Heart at War // JJ Maybank

23

Carson and Darla roll their eyes at Addie's behavior. "What I'm saying is, money doesn't make a person. You can have amazing things, but still, be rotten in the middle. Personality... Personality is what's important. Love can't be bought." He looks around at his children and me.

"In this household," Carson's voice becomes sterner as he glances back and forth between Addie and Ayden. "We could care less about money, we care about how one treats those around them."

I couldn't stop the smiling from forming on my face as his words, wondering how different Outer Banks would be if every Kook had the same mindset as the Sowers. They made you feel equal, and I loved that.

The rest of dinner went by, and when I offered to help Darla in the kitchen she refused. I found myself outside, walking along Ayden's backyard with him by my side.

I hum to myself as I look at the beautiful garden filled with roses, daisies, and sunflowers. "You know," Ayden spoke softly, taking my hand into his. "My family really likes you."

I turn to face him, our chests inches apart watching as Ayden looks down at our hands. He begins playing with my fingers, grinning to himself. "Is that so?" I giggle.

"Mhm." Ayden nods, looking back at me and interlocking our fingers. "Well, they are in luck," I joke. "Because I like them too."

Ayden laughs quickly, lowering his head to mine before connecting our lips for a brief kiss. "Addie's been asking me..." He pulls away, rubbing his nose with mine. "What we are, and I can't help but notice that I don't know what to tell her." He whispered, making my smile drop.

This doesn't go unnoticed by Ayden as he pulls away a bit in worry. "What's wrong?"

I sigh, stepping away from him and pulling my hand out of his. "I told you... I'm not ready for any kind of relationship yet." I mutter looking back down at the flowers. "I know that," Ayden scoffed, "But you let me kiss and we hang out doing things couples normally do, yet you still don't want to put a label on it? We are practical-" I cut him off.

"Practically, but we're not." I snap, instantly feeling guilty as I take notice of the hurt on his face. "Ayden... I told you from the start that it'll take time, I'm not ready yet. You have to understand that." I say this time in a much softer tone, not wanting to argue with him.

"I'm trying to understand, but I don't know what I am to you. Am I a rebound? Something to distract you from facing your actual feelings?" I gasp, looking up into Ayden's eyes and watch as they harden. "No... No, Ayden, that's not it." I denied, placing a hand on his cheek.

"Then what?" He sighed, flicking away at my touch and making me frown. "Isn't it enough to know that I care about you? You know everything that's been going on in my life and I'm still trying to figure things out," I plead, "I like hanging out with you, I care about you but I'm not ready to be your girlfriend. Can we just keep it like that for a while longer?"

Ayden's lip presses into a thin line as he closes his eyes, exhaling through his nose. I waited for a response, I didn't know what I felt for Ayden but I did know that I'm not ready to stop spending time with him... But if he was going to push me into deciding what I want, I can't do that. I won't.

So I could only hope that for right now, what I was able to tell him would be enough for him.

"Promise me that you won't leave for JJ?" He randomly blurts, opening his eyes to stare back into mine. All I could see was hope within them, I suddenly felt easy- My thoughts became hard to process.

Could I promise him that? I thought to myself. I knew that JJ and I agreed to stop things, to strictly have a friendship-only relationship even after we confessed our feelings to each other so it should have been an easy promise... But why did I find myself struggling to form the words?