Under A Rest | ☁️

Chapter 56

I tried to conceal my emotion by turning my back on them, I was about to get into my office when she held my hand.

My heart sank when I saw her on her bending knees again. Pleading me to do something I can't. Alam kong galit ako sa kaniya pero ang makita siya sa ganitong sitwasyon ay mahirap para sa akin, masakit para sa akin.

Kahit hindi maganda ang naging huling pag uusap namin, alam kong tinanggap niya ako.

"Nakikiusap ako sayo Meisha. Operahan mo ang asawa ko. Parang awa mo na"

I tilted my head to avoid my tears from falling. I don't want to cry in front of them. Ayaw kong malaman nila na mahina pa rin ako hanggang ngayon dahil baka gamitin nanaman nila laban sa akin iyon.

Same scene flashes my mind, I remember how she pleaded on me just to leave Uno, and now begging on me to do the surgery to Tito Zero.

"Cruzete stand up! Don't beg on her, I will file a case against her kapag hindi niya inoperahan ang anak ko!" estraheradang saad ng matanda habang pilit na pinapatayo si Tita Cruzete.

"Tama ho siya Atty. Mendez, do not beg on me dahil wala kayong mapapala sa akin" lumapit ako sa kaniya para ibahagi ang pinaka tumatak sa akin mula sa kaniya. "Tama ho kayo ma'am, kapag naging Ina ako, doon ko lang marerealize na tama ang ginawa mo. N-na kapag isa kang ina, gagawin mo ang lahat para sa kaniya"

Kita ko ang pagkalito sa kaniyang mga mata, I know she had no idea on what happened to my child. I'm not blaming her though, I just want her to know that I was a mother too, and I'm doing it for my child.

"And g-guess what? I-im doing this for my u-unborn c-child" this time I can't contain it anymore. I let my tears fell from my cheeks, kapag siya talaga ang usapan ay hindi ko mapigilan ang lahat ng nararamdaman ko.

"W-what did y-you just s-said?" I sensed panicked on her voice.

"I was pregnant that night you asked me to leave your son Attorney. And that man behind you...k-killed my baby...our baby" I saw how their expression changed. Shock and fear crossed their faces.

"I-is it true Sir Dad?"

"I-I don't know what you're talking about! Don't make up stories!" He shouted on me, ako pa ngayon ang nagsisinungaling?

"Bakit hindi mo alalahanin ang pananakit at pagtulak sa akin?" his eyes widened as if he realized something.

"W-wala namang kasalanan yung anak ko sa'yo. B-bakit...b-bakit kailangang pati siya madamay? Tapos ngayon...makikiusap kayo sa akin na operahan ang anak mo?" I wiped my tears away and fix my gaze on him. "I'm sorry but I will say No. You cannot change it. Never."

No one talked so I decided to turn my back again and was about to open my door but my eyes widened in horror and I was frozen when I saw Uno standing there, with so much anger and rage on his eyes while looking on his mom and Lolo, but when it turned to me it was replaced by pain and sadness.

H-he heard everything? No. This can't be. Masyadong masakit iyon para sa kaniya. Sigurado akong sisisihin niya ang sarili niya dahil hindi niya naipagtanggol ang anak niya.

"Is it true...Mom? Sir Lolo?" he is trying to contain his anger. Natatakot ako na baka bigla na lamang siyang magwala.

"I-I didn't know Apo!"

"YOU KILLED MY CHILD! I CAN'T FUCKING FORGIVE ALL OF YOU!" His loud voice filled the hallway. This is the first time I saw him shout and get mad like this, so I immediately go to him to console and calm him.

Mabilis na natunaw ang galit niya at napuno ng pagsisisi nang lapitan ko siya.

"I'm sorry baby, I'm sorry kung mag isa ka. H-hindi k-ko sinasadya Mei. H-hindi ko s-sinasadya." I closed my eyes as I embraced him, he was sobbing like a kid. Gone was the respectful and brave Uno. "Y-yung a-anak ko M-Mei, y-yung a-anak ko...h-hindi ko naipagtanggol"

I just let him cry on my shoulder. It must be so hard for him to swallow everything. Hindi biro ang mga nalaman niya. I want to blame myself for not being careful with my emotions but then, I realized it's somehow a good thing. At least nalaman niya, hindi ko rin naman gustong ilihim iyon sa kaniya.

Bilang ama ng anak namin, karapatan niya iyon. And I'm sorry for being too late in admitting to him. It took me a lot of years to tell him.

There will always be something that will pain us. We often turn our backs on it, but fate will always do something for us to face it again. Time will heal indeed but it will never guarantee that you'll not have your scar. You may heal overtime but the scars in your heart will always be there. It was like a tattoo, permanent and consistent.

Like me, over the past years I tried so hard not to think about this, but look at where I am right now. Nandito ako sa sitwasyon na iniiwasan ko. Kahit madaming taon na ang lumipas, nandito pa rin. Ang akala kong naghilom ng mga sugat, unti unting bumalik...No..hindi bumalik dahil hindi naman nawala. Pinilit ko lang iwasan pero all this time nandito pa rin, nakatatak pa rin. At ngayon hindi ko alam kung paano haharapin.

~💙