𝐓𝐨𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 - 𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐞 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐭

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲

We went through an awful lot and believe me I didn't expect all that coming from just a kiss at that lake.

I just, I couldn't resist you that day. How you moved through the water elegantly your hair in that dark red color.

Your eyes were shining beautifully while the sun kissed your skin, the freckles on your skin painting beautiful little marks on you.

It was completely over with me that moment, it was horrible.
I felt the need to touch you because I was jealous of the water that could trace your skin without you minding, the sun beaming in your eyes gracefully and the air that you breathed through your beautiful lips.

I was a goner from that moment on for you.

The way you write your songs with passion and heart-blood.

The way you want everyone in your family to be happy, to do the best for them and not for yourself.

You managed to wrap my friends around your finger in a matter of hours so how could anyone expect from me not to fall for you?

I know I shouldn't have but it was inevitable. It's as if fate formed each one of us to fit perfectly together.

You whirled up everything in my life that was important to me just to make me destroy and question everything and if I had the choice I would let you do it over and over again.

You make me want to be a different person, a better person.
You make me want to be myself.

And I wish I could've given you the same because I want you to have everything you want and everything you long for.

But it seems like that's just possible when I'm out of your way. As sad as it is if that's what's it going to take to give you the life you deserve then so it be.

I'll leave on the twentieth to go back home, you made me realize that college isn't what I want and I want to thank your for that.

Thank you for letting me hold you, kiss you and mostly thank you for letting me love you.

There is never going to be a person that I love more than I love you Arwen.
I want you to know that it probably never was someone else and it was always you.

Take care. I love you.

Timothée

"What an idiot!"

"Miss! We're here." The driver gets me out of my memory and I look up to see the campus right in front of us.

"Oh. Okay." I swallow lightly while I stare at the enormous building that is his college.

Now that I'm actually here I don't really know what I planned to tell him?
I just drove an hour away without telling my family or friends that I'm leaving and I don't even know what to say.

"Are you getting out or..?" The driver asks again and I nod.

"Yeah sorry. Here keep the change." I press some dollar bills into his hands and exit the cab.
I hear him start the engine and drive off while I stand still.

I can't chicken out now I have to do this or else I will regret it my whole life.
I check on my phone to confirm that it is the twentieth and that if I don't do it today he's going to leave and never come back.

I start to jog through the campus and quickly rush into the building of the dorms taking two steps at a time.
I'm still in my blue robe and have my hat on which gives me a few weird glances when I pass students but I'm quick at the right hall so I don't get too embarrassed.

I stop right in front of his door and straighten out my robe ready to do the right thing.
I raise my fist mid air to knock but to my surprise the door opens.

"No we should-" Robin stops talking when he sees me and my mouth opens perplexed.

"Hey." I breathe out not really intelligent making his brows furrow.

"What are you doing here?" He asks me and crosses his arms in front of his chest broadening his shoulders.

"Who's at the door-oh hey Arwen!" Hector steps up behind Robin and I give him an awkward wave.

"I wanted to see Timothée." I breathe out making Hectors brows shoot up while Robin visibly relaxes.

"He's not here." He says and it almost seems like he's satisfied with that fact.

"What do you mean? When does he come back?" I ask while deep horror sets in the pit of my stomach.

"Didn't he tell you? He left college. Dropped out." Hector says his face full of pity.

"I-I know but he said he wouldn't leave until today."

"Well but he left." Robin says and I glare at him angrily.

"You don't need to be so happy about it." I hiss as we glare at each other.

I'm not really mad at him I'm more mad at myself because I'm too late.

Hector checks his watch and then disappears into the room.

"I don't know what your problem is, I really don't but I never wanted it to be this complicated."

"It's pretty clear for me. You made the guy crazy and now he even left college because just you told him so."

"I didn't tell him you prick. You don't know the slightest bit about me so stop it with all this judging. Timothée was never going to be happy with the life he lived and maybe he even considered leaving and I was just the last straw that needed to make him realize that." I let out a small sigh.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't snap at you it's my fault that I'm too late." I apologize immediately afterwards because I know this isn't me.

It is my fault I should've opened that damn letter that day in the park with Lucy.
But I was too scared. Now it just seems ridiculous to me, crazy how things scare you in the past that get so little over the time.

"No it's okay I'm stupid-" Robin interrupts me but then gets interrupted by Hector.

"If you two would stop talking we could start driving to the airport. We all know you're stupid." He says keys and jacket in his hand.

My eyes widen while I realize what he said. Airport? That means Timothée isn't gone?!

"Couldn't you have said that earlier!" I say making him smile sheepishly.

"Well I'm saying it now."

"Okay lets go." Robin interrupts us and we finally start to leave the building.