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"Oh the tumbling reservations at the heart of my mistakes Oh some things you can't go back to 'cause you let them slip away."
J u p i t e r
I wasn't dead yet. And there was pain. The pain that I had felt so strongly before. So much pain. Death seemed so close, though so far out of reach. I struggled through the darkness, willing myself not to fall into the peaceful unconsciousness of death that was calling my name. Whispering for me. Maybe I was okay. I was finally free. But why did being free feel so wrong? I could feel my hands tied behind my back, the tips of my fingers painted with warm blood. My blood. I was a fool for wanting to live, and maybe it was my mother's stubbornness that lived on throughout my veins that pushed me to open my eyes.
They stung viciously upon impact of the flames that brewed in front of me, the heat burning my cheeks where the tears I had unknowingly shed had dried. I had been right, my hands were tied behind my back, a gag blocked out the gasps for air I managed to suck between my clenched teeth. Was I dead? Is this what death was? I wasn't sure. Maybe I deserved this pain, and maybe the sanctuary of feeling nothing wasn't in store for me.
"Jupiter." The pain subsided for a second when I heard her speak. Her voice was broken, quiet. Too quiet for Ellie. Maybe she was dead too. Maybe we had come here together. Wherever here was.
The surrounding woods didn't look familiar. The thick shrubbery almost blinding me from the night sky. The ground was wet from the rain, the soil soaking into my jeans. I needed to move, to feel like I was still able to free myself from my restraints. It was useless. The arrow that protruded from my shoulder prevented any movement, and a wave of nausea from the excruciating pain grounded me. I didn't try to move again. Pain meant you were alive. Death whispered my name again.
"Ellie?" I tried to whispered into the darkness, the gag preventing any words from truely escaping my cracked lips. My mouth was dry, and a metallic taste burned my throat.
"He saw it, Jupiter." She said softly. Confusion coursed through me, sending yet another wave of nausea up my throat,"He saw the bite." She repeated. I didn't speak. Almost truely convinced that this really was death. He saw it. I was going to die. I could feel my heart start racing in my chest. The fear of what I had prolonged for so long finally being set free from its rusted cage. The truth always found a way out. And it seemed like it had clawed at the lock, braking it open almost gracefully in the dead of night. Who was he. And how did he know. I was going to die. Ellie knew, she had called it a bite. She knew. I couldn't speak, the gag in my mouth averting me from getting so much as a groan out. I only just managed to turn my head enough to see Ellie, tied up to a post like I was, though her mouth was free of any gag.
I made a sound against the cloth, needing Ellie to look at me, I needed her to know that I was okay. That I was alive. That I was immune. A part of me could already see that she knew, and it terrified me. "Ellie," I dry heaved against the material as I tried to speak her name. She looked to be battling with herself, almost forcing her eyes to meet my own. And she did. Thank you. She needed to know, I should've told her. I had the time to tell her. Why didn't I tell her.
