Missing piece

~councilling~

"Course, I'm with you the whole time" Mark said smiling before getting out of the car. I quickly grabbed my bag and walked over grabbing his hand. 

"Sorry, just scared" I whispered. It was hard, and I wasn't giving myself enough time to heal because I needed to get back to work before I was behind again and would be another year behind in becoming a surgeon. 

"It's okay Lu, you've got me. And I'm not leaving you" Mark said smiling. As soon as we made it into the buildings we had to go through the new security doors and searches which had been put in since the shooting. 

"See wasn't too bad was it," Mark said as we both met again. 

"I get used to that bit it's the next hurdle I'm not looking forward to," I said looking at the elevator. 

"Well I know you weren't so I assembled a little team to make it feel a little bit better" Mark said pointing at Lexie, Meredith, Derek, Webber and Cristina standing by one of the elevators. 

"Mark you didn't need to," I said looking up to him with tears in my eyes. 

"Hey Luna," Derek said as we approached pulling me into a hug. 

"I missed you," I said into his shoulder. 

"Okay, little Shepherd we got this" Mark said as we all got into the elevator. 

"I'm not sure I can do this," I said shaking. 

"You what you can do? Smile and count to ten" Derek said, all the doctors began in sync counting to ten before the elevator dinged at the fourth floor. 

"Wow that wasn't so bad" I said letting out a big breath. 

"Thank you" Mark said to everyone as we all split ways. 

"Mer, can I walk with you to counselling?" I asked, I hadn't had the chance to get to know her so now would be a good chance.

"Sure" Meredith smiled as I waved Mark off and trailed behind Meredith and Cristina. As we entered the room I took the empty chair next to Lexie and Alex. I was looking out the window for a while trying to count the raindrops splashing against the glass. But I couldn't tune out the conversation for a long. I heard someone talk about a taco truck and someone being asleep. Then Lexie took my arm and I automatically knew what she was talking about.

" I read a book, well actually I and Luna did!" Lexie starting she was shaking her leg but I grabbed my attention. 

"Hmm, what!" I looked up to see everyone staring at me so I started picking at my nails.  

"About the history of mass murders in the US. You know, that's the actual name of what happened to us; it was a mass murder!" Lexie stated.

"You can't call it a terrorist attack because the murders weren't political in nature and we weren't victims of a serial killer because Mr Clark would have had to murder several people over a period than 30 days to qualify to be a serial killer!" I said it came out in one go while I ripped the bits of skin off from around my finger until I saw it bleed. 

"We- we could call it a spree killing- which is defined as killings at two or more locations with no break or pause in between. Because Mr Clark shot the guy in his car before he got here but I'm not sure that counts as a true second location since it was so close to the hospital." Her voice began to get a bit louder.  

"Which means we were a masmurdererer. Because it happened in one place, by one person and more than four people were killed!" I quietly said looking down at my feet and putting my hand in my pocket.

"So Luna the day of the shooting was your first day?" He said it in a way like he knew it was my first day but was pointing it out to my peers. 

"Yeah I've served in the army and my first day there was better" I said bluntly but it got a few laughs out of everyone. I looked around to see everyone looking at me differently, it wasn't like I was a victim they were generally listening. 

"How long did you serve?" He asked. I could tell he was asking questions to add to my file about why I should never be allowed to operate again. 

"A year and a bit, between being a resident in Boston" I said before looking over and Meredith who probably had no idea I was the last resident her mother worked with. 

"How is being in the army being a surgeon different from working in a hospital, nothing much just better coffee" I said looking down at my feet. 

"Well you could say a lot of things are different but we have just been shot at which is very similar to being over there as well as dead bodies but I suppose there was a lot that day as well. And a lot of blood" I say gulping before looking up and noticing everyone's faces have changed again to more confused and shocked. I didn't say anything just headed straight for the door. 

"She didn't have enough time in the psych ward" Alex said making all the other residents laugh but one shortly followed her out. 

I meant against the wall in a supplclosetst. I slid down the wall and started to hug my knees. I just sat there a quietly sobbed to myself. When I heard someone come in and put their arm around me and hug me. The touch of another person made me break down even more. The sob turned into more hyperventilation as I couldn't breathe at the thought of leaving the room. We just sat there for what felt like hours. Until I looked up to see who it was and I could see the name on the jacket.
Jackson Avery MD

"Oh, you're the guy who checked me into Phych?" I said wiping my tears off my face. 

"I am that guy" He smirked, looking down at my bloody hands where I'd been picking my skin. 

"So before I take you back out there let's get you all bandaged up" Jackson said rising to his feet and going through some boxes before finding a first aid box. 

"You don't have to, I can do it" I said also standing up. 

"It's okay, It'll just take a second," Jackson said wrapping my finger in a plaster. 

"Thank you," I said smiling. I recognized the last name Avery but where from I had no idea. 

"I gotta get back out there, do you want me to page Sloan?" Jackson said. 

"It's okay, I think I might just go for a nap somewhere," I said before leaving the supply closet. I noticed an on-call room across the way so went and made a bed in there. 

Jackson's POV

As I followed her out and watched her go into the on-call room I smirked to myself, she did just feel like another resident to me she was different. 

"Never gonna happen!" Karev said knocking on my shoulder. 

"What are you on about!" Moving my hand over my head trying to cover up the fact I was just staring at Luna.

"You do know she and Sloan are probably together they've stayed together since the shooting. He's held her hand the whole time. Never gonna happen. And if it did Shepherd and Sloan would be all over you" he said pointing out the obvious. 

"I was just being a friendly." Replying to him trying to not make it obvious what he said it hurt me. The thing with Karev is he says what everyone's thinking even if its mean. Its why all of us residents were so close because nobody held back opinions. 

"Just cos you checked her into psych and sat with her doesn't mean you know her she has more secrets than you think. She has known all of the attendees and the chief for a while. Why did she only show up when Derek became chief think about it." he said walking away. 

"Yeah, she is one to watch!" I mumbled to myself. 

Notes-

Hope this one wasn't too long. I've had serious writer's block recently so yeah. Hope you guys understand that Luna is gonna be someone that everyone knows they just don't realise it yet.